Sunday, December 24, 2017
The Most Critical Point...
" The most critical point in a person's life when mind can read souls and spirits" I found myself writing these words while Iam trying to focus on my study. Iam trying to chase time and grasp as much as I could and here in the middle of it I found the urgent need to write. Yes, it is the opp-session moment when you realize something you have never thought of before. What if we move in life as minds not bodies? What if we see each other as potential component to complete a piece of a puzzle? What if we don't see each other as useful tools and bad tools as if we are in a warehouse. Things go over stock and diminish by time.
No this is not what we are meant for. We are more than that. We own an excessive impressive amount of energy that if it is known and being functioned in the right direction , a wonderful world will be created and it is all within us. Consuming this endless excessive energy on the flesh level is a waste of time for us on earth. we are more than that. What if we keep feeding minds to see souls and spirits instead of limited mortal flesh that lead to all the ugliness exist within the humans patterns of communication with each other. What if we allow our minds to read souls and spirits. We are a vessel that were made for the these souls and spirits to dwell for a certain amount of time here on Earth. Dreaming of a world that is only build on minds and what they can create and offer to the general life around them. A community is focused on ideas not grouping or who is in and who is out. Still no matter what you say, situations, actions are telling more than what you say. Grouping is the biggest red flag of racism. We created all of that unwanted causes and topics. We allowed emotions, feelings, flesh and personal motives to direct in which way we want life to go and what is forming a threat to this ideological formation of stigma and taboos around the world.
What if i walk within a building that reflects the minds not an endless secrecy and conflicts that consume a huge amount of energy and as a result is a waste of life itself. he comes the movement of individualism , in a meaning that we are all different , we are all not connected in sort of ways that reflect the unity within us. We are different for a reason and not for being disregarded or excluded. The is this conflict between grouping on my conditions and grouping for different reason in social life and all lead to the increase beat of racism and discrimination within even a small building of the earth. We became so far to see the souls and spirits roaming around us not the physical existence of the flesh. Rising above all the materialistic existence and presenting what is good within the true soul dwells within you.
If you give a chance to your mind to read souls and spirits , you will understand more about the journey itself. Yet, there is this materialistic facts that we have to face every single day which is life expenses and your responsibility to carry things forward not to the worst of its picture. Your responsibility to handle everyday life situation with mindfulness that there are so many elements that bring the situation to what it is. Starting the journey of feeding minds needs to give up all the distraction and the approach of to go with flow, please everyone you know and losing yourself within the hustle and bustle of meaningless life. How do you feel after a hangover? One stand night? roaming around to please everyone? following bad company or thinking aimlessly our of your own true self, moving from one relation to another what a chaotic ladder to climb! all you get is more and more waste of life , finding yourself tired and frustrated or even commit suicide for vacious meaningless step of bad choice.
What if you look and listen to the one who is within you. It is you who can see yourself so clearly not any one else. As a human mind ,you were created in God's image. See the universe around you, how beautiful it is and how man distracted and destroyed lots of this beauty due to their covetous vicious desires. Omit the word desire and create the word inspire instead. You can do it, I can do it, we all can do it, if we listen to the quiet voice that is created within us," You are wonderfully and fearfully made" You are who you are because I love you the way you are. Bring everything back to Him the one did not make any mistake to create you the way you are not as the world wants you to be. Allow the mind to read souls and spirits not flesh and desires. BY: " The Old Ancient woaman ME" 12/24/2017
Thursday, November 23, 2017
The Mystery Equations that Sometime We can't have control Over Them
What a thought that keep repeating at the back of my brain, mind and soul? A deep wondering voice questioning what is all this about? I came from roots that belong to descendants their history go back to Ottoman family, King Abdul-Hamid .... roots that extended to Saudi Arabia, Syria and Egypt. Let's say roots that were aligned with power and conquering new region to continue the supremacy of a kingdom that always reigned by force, and battles. Generation after generation we were reminded by this history to keep reminding you of your roots and how you have to be.
The land is not an issue as they have plenty of it, big complicated mixed traditions are passing on. And the conflicts never stop. The world changed and the supremacy turned to be on the range of the family name, small empires started to form themselves within the communities they were and are in. Generation after generation started to shape their own rules and way of life . Like in old testament it is the life of plenty mixed with its own contradictions and ambiguity of what all this about. Fancy parties, expensive weddings, competition over power and it is ok to have many wives.
I felt this is not me, a rebellious spirit started to shape within me. Fancy things were not my attractions while they we with other girls, women in the family. When They saw a grown up body, I saw I grown up mind. My rebellious nature stated to reflect itself since I was 13 years old, when the battle started to get me married and I started to sign cards for my classmates as Eng.M. A huge difference I experienced at school where they nurtured and fed the mind ,and the battle in the house to see me as a body has to get married. The battle continued 7 years till I finally got my Bachelor and got married at the same time. School was my true home, so I became a teacher to pursue a dream was in mind. Yet, the same pattern happened and I became as a number to be add on in marital life. My rebellious nature never stopped and continued to pursue my master degree, giving my work and my kids all the things I wish them to be. I wouldn't be a number and that wouldn't be me.
Seeking freedom of choice and freedom of faith ,I had to leave everything behind trusting in His name. After building a name and a career, a family and a home, 9/11 became my second phase. So interesting how trauma can take us in levels of awakening after math equations and how His mercy is carrying you to understand and bring you to life again. Yes, iam 46 years old ,trying to restore myself in the way that honor Him , thanking Him for the blessing in creating the person who I am creative thinker, analytical mind and love to design new ideas and be a free to think and contribute the way He wants me to live life that reflect His wonderful creation within me. Yes, my rebellious nature is my voice to say I belong to Him not following stereotypes or love to be controlled. Iam eager to see justice and fairness in the world around me ,where it is filled with bias, discrimination and prejudice even we stand in the land of the free. Iam eager to see a world filled with transparency and honesty not trying to force others to live a certain way. A world could see you potentials, strengths and use them for the common goal, no suppression or stumbling one another for short eye sighted goals .
As Joseph, Daniel and Job, taken into a foreign land , losing everything, stood in trials and carried the pain. All they did they trusted in The One who made them .The ONE who is greater and Mightier than any force on earth. Looking up at Him calling His name, believing in the strength He had given to them not looking at where they come from or who were their people or who they were one day. It is a hard equation to be explained in one sentence or being passed on without missing pieces as we have no control over it. They are hard equations given to certain people for reason and they know so well that the missing piece of the equations are in His Hands ,THE ONE Who reigned the heavens and the earth. The ONE who let His sun shines all over the earth.
In a world still judging you by the body not the mind, we still have a long journey to walk through .... so looking at the women and girls as a body is not restricted on the Middle East cultures , it is more extreme in the West as well. By: Manal Eweis" The Old Ancient Woman"
The land is not an issue as they have plenty of it, big complicated mixed traditions are passing on. And the conflicts never stop. The world changed and the supremacy turned to be on the range of the family name, small empires started to form themselves within the communities they were and are in. Generation after generation started to shape their own rules and way of life . Like in old testament it is the life of plenty mixed with its own contradictions and ambiguity of what all this about. Fancy parties, expensive weddings, competition over power and it is ok to have many wives.
I felt this is not me, a rebellious spirit started to shape within me. Fancy things were not my attractions while they we with other girls, women in the family. When They saw a grown up body, I saw I grown up mind. My rebellious nature stated to reflect itself since I was 13 years old, when the battle started to get me married and I started to sign cards for my classmates as Eng.M. A huge difference I experienced at school where they nurtured and fed the mind ,and the battle in the house to see me as a body has to get married. The battle continued 7 years till I finally got my Bachelor and got married at the same time. School was my true home, so I became a teacher to pursue a dream was in mind. Yet, the same pattern happened and I became as a number to be add on in marital life. My rebellious nature never stopped and continued to pursue my master degree, giving my work and my kids all the things I wish them to be. I wouldn't be a number and that wouldn't be me.
Seeking freedom of choice and freedom of faith ,I had to leave everything behind trusting in His name. After building a name and a career, a family and a home, 9/11 became my second phase. So interesting how trauma can take us in levels of awakening after math equations and how His mercy is carrying you to understand and bring you to life again. Yes, iam 46 years old ,trying to restore myself in the way that honor Him , thanking Him for the blessing in creating the person who I am creative thinker, analytical mind and love to design new ideas and be a free to think and contribute the way He wants me to live life that reflect His wonderful creation within me. Yes, my rebellious nature is my voice to say I belong to Him not following stereotypes or love to be controlled. Iam eager to see justice and fairness in the world around me ,where it is filled with bias, discrimination and prejudice even we stand in the land of the free. Iam eager to see a world filled with transparency and honesty not trying to force others to live a certain way. A world could see you potentials, strengths and use them for the common goal, no suppression or stumbling one another for short eye sighted goals .
As Joseph, Daniel and Job, taken into a foreign land , losing everything, stood in trials and carried the pain. All they did they trusted in The One who made them .The ONE who is greater and Mightier than any force on earth. Looking up at Him calling His name, believing in the strength He had given to them not looking at where they come from or who were their people or who they were one day. It is a hard equation to be explained in one sentence or being passed on without missing pieces as we have no control over it. They are hard equations given to certain people for reason and they know so well that the missing piece of the equations are in His Hands ,THE ONE Who reigned the heavens and the earth. The ONE who let His sun shines all over the earth.
In a world still judging you by the body not the mind, we still have a long journey to walk through .... so looking at the women and girls as a body is not restricted on the Middle East cultures , it is more extreme in the West as well. By: Manal Eweis" The Old Ancient Woman"
Sunday, November 12, 2017
Counting My Life Journey Milestones
It has been along time since I wrote my reflections. Each day has been turning into another peak to climb. I didn't or don't have to be prepared about it.Day after day proves how much I have to change and how. The world is not designed for my utopia mind set or the naivety, ignorance and easy to trust mindset. The world is really tough. Narrow space for real outspoken truth.
Summer has been a very dramatic season that left its scars again on me. There is an iron costume ,shaped and wrapped around me. Trying to protect myself as much as I could even the everyday events are so weird not normal. Conflicts, arguments, unexplained hate from people I hardly know them.Work brought us together, yet, my presence brings uncomfortable irritating emotions around the place. Tension arouse and fill the place, again I allow the negative energy to control my thought and day.Seeking a different chance, making different interviews and knocking different doors. When God offered the opportunities, the same scenario happened as last year , the same month and the same zone , my car accident happened. That was a no other coincidence. All I thought of that time, that Iam no importance for anyone , my life does not matter. Here Iam standing to face the situation and see where it would lead me this time.
As always happens after accidents, you are not aware of anything around you, still in the shock. Remembering all past events and how my life has been faced by many crisis not only this one. Going back home after doing all what I have to do to seek a solution and get my car fixed. I sat alone in deep thought. The world does not make sense to me. All faces, conversations, smiles that I witness on daily basis ,do not make any sense for me. All hide another truth. Iam in a middle of a game. A game of one party playing it and Iam the lab rat of the game. If you couldn't control someone ,control how the world see them. Paranoid, phobic, intimidated, unsettled, filled with anxiety and fears, break their confidence, break their trust in life, crush them more and more with heavy burden that they can not stand and walk again. All this is the battle of the world not of Jesus.
After couple of days, back and knee pain, yet, I kept my silence . No system works to help a person in my situation ,you have to carry the load with a smile or more burdens will be falling unto you. Keeping my silence, trying to make ends meet. Trying to pretend nothing happened and nothing is worthy in this life around me. Paying whatever is needed to be paid. Living so frugal, isolated myself from any community I knew as my existence does bother .
Each day Iam seeking a clear, straight forward simple life, Iam 46 years old. Iam not in my 20s Or 30s. My life has been a quiet journey. People judge you according to what they see with the naked eyes. They do not see the inside So wherever I go there is a hidden battle in the place. My pain, my sorrows my losses , they do not see.All they see is the flesh and that is the huge stumbling block in my journey. Seeking a higher goal or purpose in life , does not make sense for them. To explain yourself is a waste of time and life. If you explain why, it will be taken against you, or it will be used against you. So, stabbing is something , does not bother me anymore.
What really bother me, that everyone is not seeing the privileges they already had and the freedom they owned since they were born. The endless blessings around them and what God has put inside each one of them.Poisoning life by focusing on the other and how to make their life difficult . What bother me, with all the wealth and opportunities there is shortage of empathy, understanding and inclusion. There is shortage to be aware of each word is being said about one another or someone else. What bother me, the hidden hate, prejudice, jealousy and harsh judgement to others not looking within.
Yes, looking for a deeper understanding and acceptance to all the hardships I have been going through, shows me many things I was not aware of. Walking in life not content of what God has put inside of you, will make you jealous of anyone else. Walking of life with a mindset that whoever before me, I throw them under the bus to reach first, is the jungle principal of survival , if you could not be smart, be hard. And that is the truth we live in " be hard" " be harsh" " be judgmental" " be a bully" belittle everyone that irritate you" . Then we wonder why we live such dramatic, toxic life that makes you throw up all the time you are face with all these BEs.
Looking for a face of truth is a hard journey to live, year after year ,Iam telling myself," why are we here on earth?" Please , if you truly know Jesus , let your way be like him. Make your words in agreement with your actions. As the world mixed everything up . Iam not anymore knowing where the truth is. BY: Manal Eweis" The Old Ancient Woman"
Summer has been a very dramatic season that left its scars again on me. There is an iron costume ,shaped and wrapped around me. Trying to protect myself as much as I could even the everyday events are so weird not normal. Conflicts, arguments, unexplained hate from people I hardly know them.Work brought us together, yet, my presence brings uncomfortable irritating emotions around the place. Tension arouse and fill the place, again I allow the negative energy to control my thought and day.Seeking a different chance, making different interviews and knocking different doors. When God offered the opportunities, the same scenario happened as last year , the same month and the same zone , my car accident happened. That was a no other coincidence. All I thought of that time, that Iam no importance for anyone , my life does not matter. Here Iam standing to face the situation and see where it would lead me this time.
As always happens after accidents, you are not aware of anything around you, still in the shock. Remembering all past events and how my life has been faced by many crisis not only this one. Going back home after doing all what I have to do to seek a solution and get my car fixed. I sat alone in deep thought. The world does not make sense to me. All faces, conversations, smiles that I witness on daily basis ,do not make any sense for me. All hide another truth. Iam in a middle of a game. A game of one party playing it and Iam the lab rat of the game. If you couldn't control someone ,control how the world see them. Paranoid, phobic, intimidated, unsettled, filled with anxiety and fears, break their confidence, break their trust in life, crush them more and more with heavy burden that they can not stand and walk again. All this is the battle of the world not of Jesus.
After couple of days, back and knee pain, yet, I kept my silence . No system works to help a person in my situation ,you have to carry the load with a smile or more burdens will be falling unto you. Keeping my silence, trying to make ends meet. Trying to pretend nothing happened and nothing is worthy in this life around me. Paying whatever is needed to be paid. Living so frugal, isolated myself from any community I knew as my existence does bother .
Each day Iam seeking a clear, straight forward simple life, Iam 46 years old. Iam not in my 20s Or 30s. My life has been a quiet journey. People judge you according to what they see with the naked eyes. They do not see the inside So wherever I go there is a hidden battle in the place. My pain, my sorrows my losses , they do not see.All they see is the flesh and that is the huge stumbling block in my journey. Seeking a higher goal or purpose in life , does not make sense for them. To explain yourself is a waste of time and life. If you explain why, it will be taken against you, or it will be used against you. So, stabbing is something , does not bother me anymore.
What really bother me, that everyone is not seeing the privileges they already had and the freedom they owned since they were born. The endless blessings around them and what God has put inside each one of them.Poisoning life by focusing on the other and how to make their life difficult . What bother me, with all the wealth and opportunities there is shortage of empathy, understanding and inclusion. There is shortage to be aware of each word is being said about one another or someone else. What bother me, the hidden hate, prejudice, jealousy and harsh judgement to others not looking within.
Yes, looking for a deeper understanding and acceptance to all the hardships I have been going through, shows me many things I was not aware of. Walking in life not content of what God has put inside of you, will make you jealous of anyone else. Walking of life with a mindset that whoever before me, I throw them under the bus to reach first, is the jungle principal of survival , if you could not be smart, be hard. And that is the truth we live in " be hard" " be harsh" " be judgmental" " be a bully" belittle everyone that irritate you" . Then we wonder why we live such dramatic, toxic life that makes you throw up all the time you are face with all these BEs.
Looking for a face of truth is a hard journey to live, year after year ,Iam telling myself," why are we here on earth?" Please , if you truly know Jesus , let your way be like him. Make your words in agreement with your actions. As the world mixed everything up . Iam not anymore knowing where the truth is. BY: Manal Eweis" The Old Ancient Woman"
Saturday, September 2, 2017
A journey within
When life events roll you in their drama, you have to take a stand and not allowing them to identify you or your life. You have to stop everything in your hand and pay attention to what is going around you. Lots of details in your busyness you were not aware of them. Yes, you are not free to choose or decide the life you know God has made you for. Yes, you are being on the spot of drama and a continuous intention to traumatize you brain.
Unable to have clarity of mind and confusion and intimidation, uncomfortable type of life,met with masks of sweet soft voices that hide a deep hatred to the roots I came from. It is not me, it is my authenticity and my origin. paying a price on behalf of other millions who persecute and misplace Christians in Middle East. Iam a goal to take revenge of and not being tolerated with or accepted as I am .
When we talk about persecution, it is a generational chain and it lasts till the end of this age. Yes, Iam writing with full honest and transparency . The mind set of monks and nuns I live with does not exist around and it is not accepted. Actions tell the truth more than words. So, you are not free or accepted to be free and live your simple christian life that appeals to you and yet, it does not match the world around you. You offered to be there for everyone and at times of crisis and sickness, you are on your own, going through the motions of difficulties on your own, hard to find honest guidance . Facing another moment of labor with all its painful experiences in silence you don't want to talk about it anymore.
At the time of difficulty He is carrying you, allowing you to know that He is the owner of everything you are. Refusing to believe any more lies or sweet words or fake promises. Refusing to repeart the old scenarios of taking advantage of your pains and times of difficulties. Refusing to experience the same moment again of believing the voices that say iam going to rescue you and once they take hold of your hand, they let it go and you fall drastically facing the double pain of the first pain and the fall all on your own. So who is giving the chance for this to happen over and over, it is you. As always I say it is all starts with you and what you are going to allow to be in your life.
This time pain in incurable and has no way back. This time is a clear message of who you truly are and how the world is seeing you as a perfect prey for so many hidden agendas and plots you are not aware of. Always the world is looking for a person to offer as a sacrifice for an ambitious agenda you are not aware of. And taking a stand against that you are declaring His Mighty Hands over your life . He made you the way you are and you deserve to be honored, valued, respected as a child of God. You deserve an equal chance of life like everybody around. You deserve to be respected for your choices and being a human who can be the way they know how God wants them to be. Christ gave his life so we may have life and our turn is to honor this life with all types of actions and missions to give back all the honor to him. He is the life, the way and the vine. If I do believe that Iam His child who is breathing the life He has given to me then He is within me and for me not against me.
To shake off the dust and get up and keep moving requires to walk the way on my own with Him and for Him.He knows me by name and He called me by name. So as old days, my relationship is only with Him and He knows me so well, choosing the hard way sometimes is the only way to make it trough tough times in our life. Putting my armor and having peace that He is with me in each step I take, no more loud voices only walking in trust with Him that He will guide me and lead me to the right path that meant for me in Jesus name.BY: Manal Eweis "The Old Ancient Woman"
Unable to have clarity of mind and confusion and intimidation, uncomfortable type of life,met with masks of sweet soft voices that hide a deep hatred to the roots I came from. It is not me, it is my authenticity and my origin. paying a price on behalf of other millions who persecute and misplace Christians in Middle East. Iam a goal to take revenge of and not being tolerated with or accepted as I am .
When we talk about persecution, it is a generational chain and it lasts till the end of this age. Yes, Iam writing with full honest and transparency . The mind set of monks and nuns I live with does not exist around and it is not accepted. Actions tell the truth more than words. So, you are not free or accepted to be free and live your simple christian life that appeals to you and yet, it does not match the world around you. You offered to be there for everyone and at times of crisis and sickness, you are on your own, going through the motions of difficulties on your own, hard to find honest guidance . Facing another moment of labor with all its painful experiences in silence you don't want to talk about it anymore.
At the time of difficulty He is carrying you, allowing you to know that He is the owner of everything you are. Refusing to believe any more lies or sweet words or fake promises. Refusing to repeart the old scenarios of taking advantage of your pains and times of difficulties. Refusing to experience the same moment again of believing the voices that say iam going to rescue you and once they take hold of your hand, they let it go and you fall drastically facing the double pain of the first pain and the fall all on your own. So who is giving the chance for this to happen over and over, it is you. As always I say it is all starts with you and what you are going to allow to be in your life.
This time pain in incurable and has no way back. This time is a clear message of who you truly are and how the world is seeing you as a perfect prey for so many hidden agendas and plots you are not aware of. Always the world is looking for a person to offer as a sacrifice for an ambitious agenda you are not aware of. And taking a stand against that you are declaring His Mighty Hands over your life . He made you the way you are and you deserve to be honored, valued, respected as a child of God. You deserve an equal chance of life like everybody around. You deserve to be respected for your choices and being a human who can be the way they know how God wants them to be. Christ gave his life so we may have life and our turn is to honor this life with all types of actions and missions to give back all the honor to him. He is the life, the way and the vine. If I do believe that Iam His child who is breathing the life He has given to me then He is within me and for me not against me.
To shake off the dust and get up and keep moving requires to walk the way on my own with Him and for Him.He knows me by name and He called me by name. So as old days, my relationship is only with Him and He knows me so well, choosing the hard way sometimes is the only way to make it trough tough times in our life. Putting my armor and having peace that He is with me in each step I take, no more loud voices only walking in trust with Him that He will guide me and lead me to the right path that meant for me in Jesus name.BY: Manal Eweis "The Old Ancient Woman"
Wednesday, August 9, 2017
Choices
Coming to a point where I see each choice I make and how it affects what is next. All the way the lesson is repeating itself that what message you are giving to the world that what you are going to get. Listening to the inner voice in you when it tells you a certain message. Trust your guts, yet I keep ignoring them and say no this time is different and here the ghost of pain rise up again to deliver the same same message that it knows exactly how I'll react to it. Losing my mindfulness and being affected by the drama and here the choices that follow are foggy. Your vision is not clear. So you hurt yourself over and over again.
This mysterious cycle I am going through for 7 years now asking myself am I free or I am a property? Am I free or I am enslaved? Am I free or I have no choice in my life to walk the way the God is leading me to? Am I free or am I sold without a permission? Am I free or am i prisoner for a higher authority that controls my life path, no matter Iam trying,I am losing. Lots of thinking that rob me of the peace that is given to us freely through Jesus Christ.
Does my voice count? Does my view count or i have to be like a puppet be placed wherever the owner places it or been thrown away unattended in a dark room? No one likes to be in a spot like that. Yes, my real life I am not free, yes, I don't have the authority to choose and if I do, consequences happen to put you in the jail of distrust and fears. Maybe this is how the world see a person like me. Trying my best to ignore all this background noises and here it caught me up over and over which lead me to an assurance that Iam not free. My choices are bothering others. My choices contradicts with other agendas or maybe Iam a stumbling block on their way? The question comes back again why all this? Sure they see a picture I can not see. They understand things that I can not understand. It is a fearful world to understand all my conclusion comes to be Iam not one of them.
Many times we build expectations that do not exist and here comes our greatest frustration.Why persisting to know everything happening in my life while i do not know anything about them? Why taking all my personal information promising me with a job and then they disappear like a ghost? Why judging me in everything I do while i don't do that to them? I feel Iam not free or being treated as a responsible adult and there is mutual understanding and respect. Day after day I come to know that it is all my choices and the message Iam delivering to the world. Are we here on earth to build one another or to bring some of us down? Are we honest with our selves first before others or we tend to play the game of pretend or fake it till you make it? There is nothing real or authentic there and won't bring the peace and joy that we once found in Jesus Christ.
I came to a point that walking alone sometimes is the best choice to keep yourself dignity and respect , in Jesus Christ we are set free no more slaves.By:Manal Eweis
This mysterious cycle I am going through for 7 years now asking myself am I free or I am a property? Am I free or I am enslaved? Am I free or I have no choice in my life to walk the way the God is leading me to? Am I free or am I sold without a permission? Am I free or am i prisoner for a higher authority that controls my life path, no matter Iam trying,I am losing. Lots of thinking that rob me of the peace that is given to us freely through Jesus Christ.
Does my voice count? Does my view count or i have to be like a puppet be placed wherever the owner places it or been thrown away unattended in a dark room? No one likes to be in a spot like that. Yes, my real life I am not free, yes, I don't have the authority to choose and if I do, consequences happen to put you in the jail of distrust and fears. Maybe this is how the world see a person like me. Trying my best to ignore all this background noises and here it caught me up over and over which lead me to an assurance that Iam not free. My choices are bothering others. My choices contradicts with other agendas or maybe Iam a stumbling block on their way? The question comes back again why all this? Sure they see a picture I can not see. They understand things that I can not understand. It is a fearful world to understand all my conclusion comes to be Iam not one of them.
Many times we build expectations that do not exist and here comes our greatest frustration.Why persisting to know everything happening in my life while i do not know anything about them? Why taking all my personal information promising me with a job and then they disappear like a ghost? Why judging me in everything I do while i don't do that to them? I feel Iam not free or being treated as a responsible adult and there is mutual understanding and respect. Day after day I come to know that it is all my choices and the message Iam delivering to the world. Are we here on earth to build one another or to bring some of us down? Are we honest with our selves first before others or we tend to play the game of pretend or fake it till you make it? There is nothing real or authentic there and won't bring the peace and joy that we once found in Jesus Christ.
I came to a point that walking alone sometimes is the best choice to keep yourself dignity and respect , in Jesus Christ we are set free no more slaves.By:Manal Eweis
Monday, July 31, 2017
10 Minutes Reflections
What makes us humans are our feelings and emotions. They make us stand out of any other creature. Yet, they control everything going around our life. It is not easy to find a goal focused life without the interruptions of daily communications based on our loads of feelings and emotions either by us or who ever we meet.
So interesting to experience how our feelings and emotions direct the day who we can go along with, who we can fight, who we can invite in and who we can kick out. Yes, this is how I see the daily operations within many businesses running around. It is more who I want to be in the place and who I can't stand till they are out of the door. So interesting to see humans are being moved through the cube of the business as a chess ornaments. Each player is used to stand a certain step towards the end of the game" Check mate ".So, what makes the pieces to be used over and over? It is the love of the game, seeing humans as ornaments not valuable assets, each of them is walking into the place to represent a different piece of work. Turning the place into a symphony of high performance . A performance that will lead to more creativity and productivity, by means bringing the game of win-lose into a game of bringing people into life. A life they are created for. A life will serve the noble goal of God's creation to us. We are again created in His image. No one is useless once their are no longer serve the game, or they fall short in their walk within the game.
Looking at all of this you see certain patterns are repeating themselves. The Market has no time to invest in building up true functional humans to infuse within the business. The market is looking for who is already ready, who understands the game of the bucks and how to get them into place.The market is looking for the fast rhythm of the moment, more extroverts than introverts. So it is not about empowering people for the purpose they are meant for as this cost alot of expenses. Mentor ship is another a big business game, it is a career, who couldn't afford it ,they have to go through the rough waves of school of life. Getting into the fire and see if you dare to be in the middle of this fire to exist, survive and be what you meant to be.
My experience does not say that there is no learning through the way or no one will look at you and see your potentials, nope God is good within the fire, there are angle hands throw you pieces of love and mercy to let you say Aha, Thank you God. At the main time you have to face the other side, the mean side of life. With no other thinking whoever is so aggressive and abusive to you they are both ways: first, either they are hurt alot and when I say alot that means alot that what they grasp in life that being mean and abusive is the only way to feel you exist ,you have control over situation you are the boss, you made it and now it is your turn to hurt others as much as you got hurt till you got your way at the place where you are. Especially when you meet someone that reminding you of something in your past. Your work like becomes the field of paying back the hurt have done to you in others who represent thing you hate and you don't want to see or please you when you do this to others. So hurting others or abusing them become the source of your joy, so sad to meet someone like this. The unspoken hurt has been done to them is projecting itself in their attitude and behavior with others, so bias and discrimination become your philosophy in dealing with others. Your narcissistic level increases each time you find in hurting others is a source of pleasure and satisfaction to your soul. Sorry you are a burning fire that consumes any joy exists around you. You won't be in peace even with yourself. And sorry you are not the type I like to be around as your emotions and feelings are controlling your life so no true good thing i can learn from this type of personality. When you decide that your nasty behavior with others will prove your authority and existence ,sorry I am not your victim and I won't be in this arena that you are trying to drag me to.
If rudeness, aggression, abuse are your approach to do business, let me tell you something, you will never be thankful or grateful for anything in your life, all you will live for is fighting and fighting till the end of your life race, no peace ever exist within you mind, heart and soul and by the end will be read all over your face, the most stressful impression you could ever read on the face of a person which is not healthy or inviting environment to people to stay. You are looking at people as chess ornaments and this is not what God made us for.
Oh! Jesus have you ever thought how much heavy emotions and feelings can ruin the most beautiful gift we have given freely from heaven that is called life? A life filled with so many miraculous wonderful things that reflect His beauty within us. How come we allow the rusty hurt and pain to destroy such holy beauty? How come we become a tool in the devil's hand to rob us of the peace that can exist within us? And why are you allowing this consuming fire to eat you and anyone comes near to you? Why this deep hunger to feel your authority and power over whoever you find as a potential victim to grow your narcissistic desire to be at the top of the world around you? Sorry my friend I don't find joy in this. This is tormenting life for the most precious creation made by God we as humans not ornaments.
With all this tense presence of negative energy, here comes another side of how all these diversities well managed in the place? Can an objective communication pattern of communication exist? Can be there a clear strategy toward handling difficult people at work? Not only as professional development yet are a therapeutic approach to take part in the process of helping direct this negative energy into a more productive objective approach. Instead of focusing on people, focus on the task, the goal, the outcomes and feedback and future plans? Can we have a tolerance spirit with mistakes as learning opportunities to add or modify our plans. Can we be clear about our objectives from hiring people. We are not illiterate , somehow somewhere everyone got a fair amount of education that means there is a base and this base needs to be built on in a good shape not destructive shape? As we can we put aside our mental battles with differences among us and see the person for the real he/she not as you want them to be? have you though of people mining as you search for gold and silver in the mountains buried deep in the dirt and rocks can you consider the people as your treasure that needs to be refined to let them shine not putting their shine to death? If it is all about the money and who deserve it and who don't who is in and who is out so the point here is not the person him/her self. The point here is like a father who chooses to bless one of his sons and kick out the other son and God never does this to us He blesses us all , so it is all human-made- laws, so please don't anticipate God in your own thinking and choices you make and the game you want to play.
Social Justice is an ancient case, yet we haven't learnt the lesson yet. Looking forward to straight clear objective way of communication. Communication that respect the person in front of you. Communication that presents the best in you. Communication that is telling the truth not manipulating the situations. Communication that clarify the way that you want to head to. The far end goal. Communication that is filled with clarity, accountability, transparency and justice.
If we take 10 minutes out of our day to write down : Why am I in this place? What is my role here? Does it go with the common goal of the place? if yes, how if not why? and how does this difference and be added to the place and what challenges may occur out of that? How am I going to deal with these challenges? Give it a try, Give it time, collect your resources, analyse them , draw your recent situation conclusions, bring out the results , feedback what works what does not wok and then come to final conclusion lessons learnt, lessons needs to be learnt, what skills do I need to reach this level of performance and above all is this what i meant to be? Do I find myself in this work or I lost myself and do not see a taste of life out of it. Do not over burden yourself,keep trying you will know it when you reach it. The true you all goes to your 10 minutes daily reflection. No matter the type of work you do, it will build up itself one day, keep exploring yourself and never be a victim of your circumstance, by: Manal Eweis" The Old Ancient Woman"
So interesting to experience how our feelings and emotions direct the day who we can go along with, who we can fight, who we can invite in and who we can kick out. Yes, this is how I see the daily operations within many businesses running around. It is more who I want to be in the place and who I can't stand till they are out of the door. So interesting to see humans are being moved through the cube of the business as a chess ornaments. Each player is used to stand a certain step towards the end of the game" Check mate ".So, what makes the pieces to be used over and over? It is the love of the game, seeing humans as ornaments not valuable assets, each of them is walking into the place to represent a different piece of work. Turning the place into a symphony of high performance . A performance that will lead to more creativity and productivity, by means bringing the game of win-lose into a game of bringing people into life. A life they are created for. A life will serve the noble goal of God's creation to us. We are again created in His image. No one is useless once their are no longer serve the game, or they fall short in their walk within the game.
Looking at all of this you see certain patterns are repeating themselves. The Market has no time to invest in building up true functional humans to infuse within the business. The market is looking for who is already ready, who understands the game of the bucks and how to get them into place.The market is looking for the fast rhythm of the moment, more extroverts than introverts. So it is not about empowering people for the purpose they are meant for as this cost alot of expenses. Mentor ship is another a big business game, it is a career, who couldn't afford it ,they have to go through the rough waves of school of life. Getting into the fire and see if you dare to be in the middle of this fire to exist, survive and be what you meant to be.
My experience does not say that there is no learning through the way or no one will look at you and see your potentials, nope God is good within the fire, there are angle hands throw you pieces of love and mercy to let you say Aha, Thank you God. At the main time you have to face the other side, the mean side of life. With no other thinking whoever is so aggressive and abusive to you they are both ways: first, either they are hurt alot and when I say alot that means alot that what they grasp in life that being mean and abusive is the only way to feel you exist ,you have control over situation you are the boss, you made it and now it is your turn to hurt others as much as you got hurt till you got your way at the place where you are. Especially when you meet someone that reminding you of something in your past. Your work like becomes the field of paying back the hurt have done to you in others who represent thing you hate and you don't want to see or please you when you do this to others. So hurting others or abusing them become the source of your joy, so sad to meet someone like this. The unspoken hurt has been done to them is projecting itself in their attitude and behavior with others, so bias and discrimination become your philosophy in dealing with others. Your narcissistic level increases each time you find in hurting others is a source of pleasure and satisfaction to your soul. Sorry you are a burning fire that consumes any joy exists around you. You won't be in peace even with yourself. And sorry you are not the type I like to be around as your emotions and feelings are controlling your life so no true good thing i can learn from this type of personality. When you decide that your nasty behavior with others will prove your authority and existence ,sorry I am not your victim and I won't be in this arena that you are trying to drag me to.
If rudeness, aggression, abuse are your approach to do business, let me tell you something, you will never be thankful or grateful for anything in your life, all you will live for is fighting and fighting till the end of your life race, no peace ever exist within you mind, heart and soul and by the end will be read all over your face, the most stressful impression you could ever read on the face of a person which is not healthy or inviting environment to people to stay. You are looking at people as chess ornaments and this is not what God made us for.
Oh! Jesus have you ever thought how much heavy emotions and feelings can ruin the most beautiful gift we have given freely from heaven that is called life? A life filled with so many miraculous wonderful things that reflect His beauty within us. How come we allow the rusty hurt and pain to destroy such holy beauty? How come we become a tool in the devil's hand to rob us of the peace that can exist within us? And why are you allowing this consuming fire to eat you and anyone comes near to you? Why this deep hunger to feel your authority and power over whoever you find as a potential victim to grow your narcissistic desire to be at the top of the world around you? Sorry my friend I don't find joy in this. This is tormenting life for the most precious creation made by God we as humans not ornaments.
With all this tense presence of negative energy, here comes another side of how all these diversities well managed in the place? Can an objective communication pattern of communication exist? Can be there a clear strategy toward handling difficult people at work? Not only as professional development yet are a therapeutic approach to take part in the process of helping direct this negative energy into a more productive objective approach. Instead of focusing on people, focus on the task, the goal, the outcomes and feedback and future plans? Can we have a tolerance spirit with mistakes as learning opportunities to add or modify our plans. Can we be clear about our objectives from hiring people. We are not illiterate , somehow somewhere everyone got a fair amount of education that means there is a base and this base needs to be built on in a good shape not destructive shape? As we can we put aside our mental battles with differences among us and see the person for the real he/she not as you want them to be? have you though of people mining as you search for gold and silver in the mountains buried deep in the dirt and rocks can you consider the people as your treasure that needs to be refined to let them shine not putting their shine to death? If it is all about the money and who deserve it and who don't who is in and who is out so the point here is not the person him/her self. The point here is like a father who chooses to bless one of his sons and kick out the other son and God never does this to us He blesses us all , so it is all human-made- laws, so please don't anticipate God in your own thinking and choices you make and the game you want to play.
Social Justice is an ancient case, yet we haven't learnt the lesson yet. Looking forward to straight clear objective way of communication. Communication that respect the person in front of you. Communication that presents the best in you. Communication that is telling the truth not manipulating the situations. Communication that clarify the way that you want to head to. The far end goal. Communication that is filled with clarity, accountability, transparency and justice.
If we take 10 minutes out of our day to write down : Why am I in this place? What is my role here? Does it go with the common goal of the place? if yes, how if not why? and how does this difference and be added to the place and what challenges may occur out of that? How am I going to deal with these challenges? Give it a try, Give it time, collect your resources, analyse them , draw your recent situation conclusions, bring out the results , feedback what works what does not wok and then come to final conclusion lessons learnt, lessons needs to be learnt, what skills do I need to reach this level of performance and above all is this what i meant to be? Do I find myself in this work or I lost myself and do not see a taste of life out of it. Do not over burden yourself,keep trying you will know it when you reach it. The true you all goes to your 10 minutes daily reflection. No matter the type of work you do, it will build up itself one day, keep exploring yourself and never be a victim of your circumstance, by: Manal Eweis" The Old Ancient Woman"
Sunday, July 30, 2017
It was the time
Sometimes you do your best to stand strong in the face of the storm. Hurting tunes and words penetrate through your heart like poisonous swords. As I mentioned before Christians are persecuted in so many areas of the world and this pain every christian carries especially the devoted ones. The ones not only seeing it as a historical time line but as a way of life to live for. Eye for eye, life for life. It is that deep bitterness, anger and unending line of tears.
The pain is deep, the hurt is ongoing and persecution became a daily routine that may occur even without thinking about it or planning for it, it becomes as a second nature to live. When this pain become a second nature, some start to see any person related to these hot spots as a chance to take revenge of what has been heard, read or watched through the Media. So as a new born Christian it is hard for them to accept me as Iam . No, their mind is set up on the pain and the hurt. Not fully accepted, welcomed or there is a true open heart for a person like me. Wherever I go everybody is stressed around me. You don't feel the peace or the smoothness of any routine around. So you start to carry your pain with you wherever you go.This the price you pay over and over and did you plan this one day? did you envision it? or anybody told you about the price you have to pay when you say Iam a christian and here my story? Nope, it is my journey through the valley of the shadow of death. I can't see the light yet.
You walk through your day, carrying your hurt and pain. Carrying the mark that you are Arab person, not trusted or fully accepted. Walking as a stranger among faces.. Walking with heavy steps that you know what the eyes, faces, minds and hearts say" You are a red spot" be careful, stranger danger and the joy of life is lost. Nothing to say but to walk with your pain and hurt even when hurtful conversations are directed to you. The price of being a different identity and life style. Carrying your pain and closing yourself in a dark place, everything you try to do, there is a slap in the face and doors are closed. As if the message is sent"Go away, we do not want you here?" No matter you do, what has been drawn about you, they do not want to change it. No matter what you say is ridiculed or being ignored.
Is this what I gave my life for? Is this how we plant an inviting approach for others to love who they are and be who they are without questioning or doubting or throwing swords into their hearts? Anger, bitterness are growing day by day. Less conversations as you no longer feel your existence around, people become like shadows for you. You don't want more talking. Machines come back to be your friend not humans as you are not a human anymore. You are unwanted creature wherever you go. What makes you keep moving and day after day the message is repeating itself, "Go away, we do not want you here." Storms never stop. It was the time when I detached myself from any feelings could exist. It was the time to walk without a hint to do what you have to do even the message is clear telling you" Go away........" That is the reality we live in when no direct communication or acceptance to people who exist on earth, people like me. Or maybe Iam totally wrong and there is something I don't understand or maybe Iam stubborn to insist that one day, one time one moment there will be a hope for a change.
I don't want to keep going battling the same old patterns of pain and detours even I don't understand lots of things around me. I am trying to get up and stand and walk the day that is given freely from heaven to do something. Even washing dirty dishes or doing the stinky job as a friend said before. If this is all what is offered by the world, take it and keep moving. Pain won't end, hurt won't end this is the history and the history is repeating itself over and over, no light till the sun rises.By: Manal Eweis The old ancient woman
The pain is deep, the hurt is ongoing and persecution became a daily routine that may occur even without thinking about it or planning for it, it becomes as a second nature to live. When this pain become a second nature, some start to see any person related to these hot spots as a chance to take revenge of what has been heard, read or watched through the Media. So as a new born Christian it is hard for them to accept me as Iam . No, their mind is set up on the pain and the hurt. Not fully accepted, welcomed or there is a true open heart for a person like me. Wherever I go everybody is stressed around me. You don't feel the peace or the smoothness of any routine around. So you start to carry your pain with you wherever you go.This the price you pay over and over and did you plan this one day? did you envision it? or anybody told you about the price you have to pay when you say Iam a christian and here my story? Nope, it is my journey through the valley of the shadow of death. I can't see the light yet.
You walk through your day, carrying your hurt and pain. Carrying the mark that you are Arab person, not trusted or fully accepted. Walking as a stranger among faces.. Walking with heavy steps that you know what the eyes, faces, minds and hearts say" You are a red spot" be careful, stranger danger and the joy of life is lost. Nothing to say but to walk with your pain and hurt even when hurtful conversations are directed to you. The price of being a different identity and life style. Carrying your pain and closing yourself in a dark place, everything you try to do, there is a slap in the face and doors are closed. As if the message is sent"Go away, we do not want you here?" No matter you do, what has been drawn about you, they do not want to change it. No matter what you say is ridiculed or being ignored.
Is this what I gave my life for? Is this how we plant an inviting approach for others to love who they are and be who they are without questioning or doubting or throwing swords into their hearts? Anger, bitterness are growing day by day. Less conversations as you no longer feel your existence around, people become like shadows for you. You don't want more talking. Machines come back to be your friend not humans as you are not a human anymore. You are unwanted creature wherever you go. What makes you keep moving and day after day the message is repeating itself, "Go away, we do not want you here." Storms never stop. It was the time when I detached myself from any feelings could exist. It was the time to walk without a hint to do what you have to do even the message is clear telling you" Go away........" That is the reality we live in when no direct communication or acceptance to people who exist on earth, people like me. Or maybe Iam totally wrong and there is something I don't understand or maybe Iam stubborn to insist that one day, one time one moment there will be a hope for a change.
I don't want to keep going battling the same old patterns of pain and detours even I don't understand lots of things around me. I am trying to get up and stand and walk the day that is given freely from heaven to do something. Even washing dirty dishes or doing the stinky job as a friend said before. If this is all what is offered by the world, take it and keep moving. Pain won't end, hurt won't end this is the history and the history is repeating itself over and over, no light till the sun rises.By: Manal Eweis The old ancient woman
Friday, July 28, 2017
It Is Not A Rocket Science
For the years I have been trailed and still, life comes with the hardest lesson you could ever face. Smiley faces with spikes. Masks cover a whole different identity of what is seen or pretended to be. Wondering where can you find a true face of life not fake ones. Wearing a mask became the true identity of the 21st century delusional realities we live in. The core point is which mask are you wearing and why? From the deep bottom of my heart I come to believe what I see is not the whole truth. What I hear is not the whole truth and sometimes things are twisted. Repetitive patterns of breaking trust so you keep your authority and control over the place you are in.The game of life sharks against gold fishes. And Man can't you stand this rough wave of sharks ? Can't you survive the whip of their tail? Can't you look normal around? Really, you want to survive? and why you want to survive if you are looked at as a good bait? Oh! Jesus, never imagined one day that me will be looked at a bait to fish more sharks in the ocean so my existence or survival doesn't matter for the sharks that control the situation and have authority to do whatever they want to do with people like me.
And here comes the question mark do we really believe that humans have value to have life of their own choice? Can they have their dignity and self respect as humans without being misused or not considered as full humans are able to understand and do what is best for their own? or Do they have to fall as victims of their circumstances? What represent life in the world of sharks? Choosing to say No to anything depreciate your value as a human worthy of life, life filled with respect- trust and dignity, sometimes is not the right solutions for the sharks who see you as a good bait for a complex agenda and more blood shedding in a message of wrong doing or condemnation , tracing you like shadows, make sure that you fell into the trap and no way out. Make your world so tight that you hardly can see a ray of hope, again power and authority are playing their double edged game, smile with a sword in hand . You know this route and what it leads to, using you as a no value sacrifice , as a front line to vicious agendas .Another question is rising itself why are we here on earth? Why are we giving minds and life? Why are we shaped this way not another? There is a reason for this. You are not given a mind and life to be smashed like a hot potato or being isolated from what is called real life. So hard to absorb tens and tens of negative messages on daily basis and you can not argue with each one of them. You do not want to give it a chance to think about it twice as this is not what I was made for. God made me for me. God made me to be His servant to sow a seed of kindness through the way I go. There is alot of hurt in this life, unspoken hurt. Abusive people, you can not change them they love the way they are, this is how they get their way in life to be at the top of their abused person. It is not their fault to abuse you. It is your fault that you gave them the chance to do this to you.
Abusing is a sickness, a person who tends to abuse or hurt others is sick . His/her sickness is incurable so why you choose a lost battle and hoping they will change. What made them like this either they were abused till the death or this is how they learnt to get their way. All their behaviors always justified and because of your silence their voice is louder than you. They win , you lose. They have control you lose control.They understand what they are doing, you are clueless. You are the one who takes all responsibility for any hurt comes into your life. You are giving the chance to be hurt over and over so no matter how angry you could be.No matter how sad you could ever be, no matter how hurt you have or bitterness in your heart.You have to fix yourself. It is not a rocket science ,it is simple and clear , the main focus is on you to fix yourself. To identify the red flags and the repetitive patterns that keep repeating themselves. Something in you is representing a message to others that you are ok with hurt and abuse. Not everyone you meet has a noble heart. Admit it you are presenting a message to the world that you have been victimized and it is ok to be done again , so shame on you not anyone else. Shame on you not to stand out as a full creation of The ONE and The ONLY God. Shame on you that you believe the false messages again and again. Shame on you that you think that you are in a different world and everything is perfect. Shame on you that you listen to the words and you fall asleep and not be awake. Shame on you no to save your self-respect and walk freely within the spirit ,Trusting God and why He made you the way you are. No one has authority over you but God. You have freewill to choose and live the life that you believe in. If there is no clear messages so it is no no. It s no if what is said not honoring Him. It is no if what is said break your dignity and self worth. It is no if what is being done by demolishing your existence within the universe. It is no if there is no clear boundaries for your self-respect.
Take your time, to understand who you truly are ,and as long as you are convinced with what is right for you. No one else will have authority over your life but God and you. It is your identity within Him not in the world By: Manal Eweis" The Old Ancient Woman"
And here comes the question mark do we really believe that humans have value to have life of their own choice? Can they have their dignity and self respect as humans without being misused or not considered as full humans are able to understand and do what is best for their own? or Do they have to fall as victims of their circumstances? What represent life in the world of sharks? Choosing to say No to anything depreciate your value as a human worthy of life, life filled with respect- trust and dignity, sometimes is not the right solutions for the sharks who see you as a good bait for a complex agenda and more blood shedding in a message of wrong doing or condemnation , tracing you like shadows, make sure that you fell into the trap and no way out. Make your world so tight that you hardly can see a ray of hope, again power and authority are playing their double edged game, smile with a sword in hand . You know this route and what it leads to, using you as a no value sacrifice , as a front line to vicious agendas .Another question is rising itself why are we here on earth? Why are we giving minds and life? Why are we shaped this way not another? There is a reason for this. You are not given a mind and life to be smashed like a hot potato or being isolated from what is called real life. So hard to absorb tens and tens of negative messages on daily basis and you can not argue with each one of them. You do not want to give it a chance to think about it twice as this is not what I was made for. God made me for me. God made me to be His servant to sow a seed of kindness through the way I go. There is alot of hurt in this life, unspoken hurt. Abusive people, you can not change them they love the way they are, this is how they get their way in life to be at the top of their abused person. It is not their fault to abuse you. It is your fault that you gave them the chance to do this to you.
Abusing is a sickness, a person who tends to abuse or hurt others is sick . His/her sickness is incurable so why you choose a lost battle and hoping they will change. What made them like this either they were abused till the death or this is how they learnt to get their way. All their behaviors always justified and because of your silence their voice is louder than you. They win , you lose. They have control you lose control.They understand what they are doing, you are clueless. You are the one who takes all responsibility for any hurt comes into your life. You are giving the chance to be hurt over and over so no matter how angry you could be.No matter how sad you could ever be, no matter how hurt you have or bitterness in your heart.You have to fix yourself. It is not a rocket science ,it is simple and clear , the main focus is on you to fix yourself. To identify the red flags and the repetitive patterns that keep repeating themselves. Something in you is representing a message to others that you are ok with hurt and abuse. Not everyone you meet has a noble heart. Admit it you are presenting a message to the world that you have been victimized and it is ok to be done again , so shame on you not anyone else. Shame on you not to stand out as a full creation of The ONE and The ONLY God. Shame on you that you believe the false messages again and again. Shame on you that you think that you are in a different world and everything is perfect. Shame on you that you listen to the words and you fall asleep and not be awake. Shame on you no to save your self-respect and walk freely within the spirit ,Trusting God and why He made you the way you are. No one has authority over you but God. You have freewill to choose and live the life that you believe in. If there is no clear messages so it is no no. It s no if what is said not honoring Him. It is no if what is said break your dignity and self worth. It is no if what is being done by demolishing your existence within the universe. It is no if there is no clear boundaries for your self-respect.
Take your time, to understand who you truly are ,and as long as you are convinced with what is right for you. No one else will have authority over your life but God and you. It is your identity within Him not in the world By: Manal Eweis" The Old Ancient Woman"
Tuesday, July 18, 2017
It is not A Common Sense
It is a big deep sigh coming from my hurting heart. Yes. I admit it. Witnessing on daily basis how hurt can shape a big angle of its expansion to the world. It came to my mind here in the world we hear and see what is called bias, prejudice, discrimination, hatred, persecution, segregation, terms that are created by humans from one generation to another and are being taught from one generation to another.Yet, another term that we are not focused on so much due to speed wheel of responsibilities, and the fear of not surviving the race and status of life.
It is a fierce undeclared battle run on daily basis especially at small business, in each story you can see the hurt that had been done to a person and how it affect their perception of everyone around them . You come to know those who are attempting to hurt you, already had been hurt. Looking for someone weaker to through their hurt upon either physically, verbally, or mentally. All ache is arousing when situations occurred. The most powerful among them is the most hurt person over the years of their lives.
Anger projects itself, stress, negativity all are energy suckers, all they think of at this point is to get the anger out, unconsciously hurting another, someone has to take the burning fire within on. Thinking of what we always be reminded at the church wherever I am , I am a child of God. In reality it is a marathon of survival,God is not the core, sometimes you hear the word God or Jesus being said like fashion to show off. You don't feel the sincerity in proclaiming it, as action are the true reflection of our thoughts and feelings which are shown in our actions. So, I come to convince myself that not everything I hear or see is true. Actions speak louder than words. No one will walk life for you, it is your responsibility to walk your life, your own journey. Don't count on others' promises or praise or complements, be aware of who you are and who you belong to and How He made you this way .It is not anymore about common sense ,it is about common fulfillment within of who you are in God's eyes.
If we see most of the conflicts around the world, it is all about the fore teachings that had been established and structured within building communities. You see in Sunni countries , Shiite are not allowed in religious jobs or politics or congress. So they focus on Science and Mathematics and do the religious matters and politics in Shiite countries. So in Shiite countries all other religions are minorities Sunni and Jews and Christians . Also in Sunni countries, Christians , Jews are minorities they do not have the full freedom to hold certain position due to the common sense of the country. In Buddhist countries , it is hard to declare different religions to have authority as well. and the list goes on even in Western Culture minorities have to shape their own rules and laws that guarantee the authority of the group and eliminate anyone else don't belong to the group and this shapes a hierarchy of polices and certain structures hard to break.
This hierarchy decides who is in and who is out. How the shape of the community has to be. So minorities do shape great shifting power in economics, politics, and wealth. I call them the life ahead concentrations. To play by their rules it is a challenging game especially to a disarmed person like me. So what disarmed here means" You are one person, no family, no connections, no authority . no influence by any status you are none, literally non if you are give a sort of life, you have to be grateful, to have a point of view or a dream who are you, you are old, out of fashion, you have acne, spots, all over your face, bad foot, missing two teeth, wearing glasses, out of the world, not professional , living day by day wage" So who you are and what do you want? These are the messages that are delivered by the world around. Messages do not give you hope of a better life or future, messages may break your heart and let you think, do hurtful people are mostly hurt from the first place? and this hurt left untreated and so no one paid their attention to so they are walking in life to hurt hurt others, without realizing what they are truly doing? They never ask themselves how despite all these negative messages you continue to show up? I have no answer to that but Iam a child of God, Iam a servant of the ONE Mighty GOD. He sees me and knows me by name. He is nourishing my soul by His word which is the only truth here on earth . It is hard for me to believe something else. Walking with my creator seeking His guidance no matter how much I got hurt or being persecuted even on the land of the free as it is all about the person and where they came from, from a place of hurt or a place of God's love, that is what makes the difference not your common sense. When you deal with a person remember they carry the structured rules and laws that they vowed to obey.
The more you question any existence, the more you come to know, nothing is worthy. Forgive me to say it again nothing is worthy away from God. We came empty handed and will be back to Him empty handed so instead of putting all your dirty energy in my life, throw it away in a void place where you may meet Him the ONE who will wash all this away. Give respect to His creation not humiliation . Treat people as they like to be treated, with respect, dignity and God's love which is given to us freely. Keep moving His voice is leading you so never look back for even a second as what is past is passed already, you couldn't turn it back. If you really know who you truly belong to , treat each other with respect, enough hurt. Walls already exist so try not to build more walls and show respect, even they don't want to give it back .By: Manal Eweis " The Old Ancient Woman"
It is a fierce undeclared battle run on daily basis especially at small business, in each story you can see the hurt that had been done to a person and how it affect their perception of everyone around them . You come to know those who are attempting to hurt you, already had been hurt. Looking for someone weaker to through their hurt upon either physically, verbally, or mentally. All ache is arousing when situations occurred. The most powerful among them is the most hurt person over the years of their lives.
Anger projects itself, stress, negativity all are energy suckers, all they think of at this point is to get the anger out, unconsciously hurting another, someone has to take the burning fire within on. Thinking of what we always be reminded at the church wherever I am , I am a child of God. In reality it is a marathon of survival,God is not the core, sometimes you hear the word God or Jesus being said like fashion to show off. You don't feel the sincerity in proclaiming it, as action are the true reflection of our thoughts and feelings which are shown in our actions. So, I come to convince myself that not everything I hear or see is true. Actions speak louder than words. No one will walk life for you, it is your responsibility to walk your life, your own journey. Don't count on others' promises or praise or complements, be aware of who you are and who you belong to and How He made you this way .It is not anymore about common sense ,it is about common fulfillment within of who you are in God's eyes.
If we see most of the conflicts around the world, it is all about the fore teachings that had been established and structured within building communities. You see in Sunni countries , Shiite are not allowed in religious jobs or politics or congress. So they focus on Science and Mathematics and do the religious matters and politics in Shiite countries. So in Shiite countries all other religions are minorities Sunni and Jews and Christians . Also in Sunni countries, Christians , Jews are minorities they do not have the full freedom to hold certain position due to the common sense of the country. In Buddhist countries , it is hard to declare different religions to have authority as well. and the list goes on even in Western Culture minorities have to shape their own rules and laws that guarantee the authority of the group and eliminate anyone else don't belong to the group and this shapes a hierarchy of polices and certain structures hard to break.
This hierarchy decides who is in and who is out. How the shape of the community has to be. So minorities do shape great shifting power in economics, politics, and wealth. I call them the life ahead concentrations. To play by their rules it is a challenging game especially to a disarmed person like me. So what disarmed here means" You are one person, no family, no connections, no authority . no influence by any status you are none, literally non if you are give a sort of life, you have to be grateful, to have a point of view or a dream who are you, you are old, out of fashion, you have acne, spots, all over your face, bad foot, missing two teeth, wearing glasses, out of the world, not professional , living day by day wage" So who you are and what do you want? These are the messages that are delivered by the world around. Messages do not give you hope of a better life or future, messages may break your heart and let you think, do hurtful people are mostly hurt from the first place? and this hurt left untreated and so no one paid their attention to so they are walking in life to hurt hurt others, without realizing what they are truly doing? They never ask themselves how despite all these negative messages you continue to show up? I have no answer to that but Iam a child of God, Iam a servant of the ONE Mighty GOD. He sees me and knows me by name. He is nourishing my soul by His word which is the only truth here on earth . It is hard for me to believe something else. Walking with my creator seeking His guidance no matter how much I got hurt or being persecuted even on the land of the free as it is all about the person and where they came from, from a place of hurt or a place of God's love, that is what makes the difference not your common sense. When you deal with a person remember they carry the structured rules and laws that they vowed to obey.
The more you question any existence, the more you come to know, nothing is worthy. Forgive me to say it again nothing is worthy away from God. We came empty handed and will be back to Him empty handed so instead of putting all your dirty energy in my life, throw it away in a void place where you may meet Him the ONE who will wash all this away. Give respect to His creation not humiliation . Treat people as they like to be treated, with respect, dignity and God's love which is given to us freely. Keep moving His voice is leading you so never look back for even a second as what is past is passed already, you couldn't turn it back. If you really know who you truly belong to , treat each other with respect, enough hurt. Walls already exist so try not to build more walls and show respect, even they don't want to give it back .By: Manal Eweis " The Old Ancient Woman"
Saturday, July 8, 2017
Going Through The Mystery
Ok, for the seventh year Iam walking through the journey of the unknown. As a refugee was my start, with one suite case, moving from one place to another, carried by the grace of God, not understanding lots and lots of things around me, a very primitive approach shaped within an adult. A woman figure, by herself knocking doors , lost in her trauma , unaware of many things she explains. It is a world looks like being lost in a far end of a world of the unknown. Words can not express how it feels or how the world receives you, you go from mountain to mountain from time to time there are key words are given for you to walk through a new mystery to be solved.
The whole truth or facts won't be given to you, you have to explore and experience on your own. A world filled with suspicions, phobia, illusions from what is going on around the world. You may be stigmatized in a different way due to your ethnicity or status. We live in a world of too much negative around as if our value does not exist. Unfortunately if you are trying to present a new story a way of millions of stereotyped you will be marked " high risk" or" a house on fire" " watch out" " pay attention" or " red flag" or " High potential threat" so many labels can be put on you if you choose a different way of living as many stories through the history the worrier has to face the giants, giants of authorities, power and influence. It does not matter if you are a man or a woman, your destiny brings you to deep valleys some to knock you down, some to allow you to see life in a different way. All what matters is what is behind all of this. Sometimes I tell myself why the world even exist?
Like in ancients myths you have to fight with Gods of the world it is all about the upper hand over anything else. To see your self as a tiny grand of sand trying to find her way in such very mysterious world around her. Thinking of the multidimensional of a thing. Each network has vertices, edges and faces. Most of the journey you are dealing with faces, hardly to be in direct contact with edges that connect all the dimensions together to lead to the vertices, the top planner or checkmate. Each face either to bring you down, teach you a lesson or be a friend to walk with you no matter who you are. Yet, some faces do show up for specific task is meant either for good or bad. That is how you find yourself in the new world.
Counting your blessings in the midst of the journey, collecting stones from all shapes and sizes, stones of the lessons are being taught to you all the way. Nothing happen by accident. Racing within the unknown is not an easy journey. Can a woman survive trauma ? Can the world be part of healing or destruction? Can the mystery be solved and make life easier for her? by the end what is all of this about?
In the midst of each storm ray of hope shows up, something delightful happens, bringing you to be connected to the land that open its doors for me a a refugee to say you have a home now you are a citizen. Welcome home, you made it . having a home a land to belong to that is a new start of what you want to be within your new home, the breath of freedom of choice and face. Yet it is not only me my land open its door to, they open their doors for everyone even those who reminds me of my hurt and pain. Once I see anyone belongs to the past, the other side I lived in, I feel it all over my body. The pain , hurt and anger arouse to the surface again to remind me why I came here to this land at the first place. Flashbacks and a change of my state of mind occurs, trying to hold myself together and realize, Healing didn't happen yet, Iam not there yet, I say I forgive alot yet when it comes to real life, I realize I am not.
Day after dayIam telling myself Iam here now, Iam safe, no more fears, Iam no longer a personal property to anyone, Iam free Iam not afraid. Daily confirmation to stand on my solid ground Jesus Christ, giving myself as his servant and a daughter of the king of kings. Do words only sufficient or I want to do something more. The way I breathe, think and see the world around me. May when they come my way, God wants to tell me something , look at you, you made it so far a whole new person in Jesus Christ so don't be afraid , walk tall and strong even many things do not sound or look right.
Another question so why certain people come my way in the same same pattern and trying to constrain me, limit my life and why they act like that? Or think like that or do this or that ? They do not own me? Or because there are millions of Christians overseas being persecuted, am I being persecuted in a different way? This type of victimized mindset I don't want it. Even there is something does not feel right, I have to walk in the truth that Jesus set me free and not to destroy myself by thinking in this direction. Who accept me as I am, do not need and permission from anyone to accept me the way Iam. Who don't accept me, no matter who Iam or I do they won't accept me and I have no control over that. Who wants to see me in a certain way they will do whatever they could to confirm to the rest of the world this picture and I have no control over that either. Yes, there is good and bad in the world.Yes, there is always stereotyped of actions, stories, and behaviors. Yes there is a masking world what is seen is not the truth. Yes, we many times tend to be not honest toward each other due to different agendas and interests. Yet,I don't have to be part of all of that ,Iam who I am ,I get lost in my thoughts, I question everything.I analyse everything, I don't get anything in my life unless it is true, and proved its honesty. Yes I love to predict and do lots of psychs that is how my brain was created or I inherited this type of mind from my ancestors .Yes, I love exploring, experimenting and reading people and all this is a gift from God. He is showing me lots of great things how Mighty He is in creating us the way we are, Walking through His mysterious creation of making us all the way we are , is my greatest lesson to learn and be thankful for, diving within the deep of our complex mentalities even in the simplest things we do, Lord break me free to say it out and loud I am YOURS, by: Manal Eweis" The old Ancient Woman"
The whole truth or facts won't be given to you, you have to explore and experience on your own. A world filled with suspicions, phobia, illusions from what is going on around the world. You may be stigmatized in a different way due to your ethnicity or status. We live in a world of too much negative around as if our value does not exist. Unfortunately if you are trying to present a new story a way of millions of stereotyped you will be marked " high risk" or" a house on fire" " watch out" " pay attention" or " red flag" or " High potential threat" so many labels can be put on you if you choose a different way of living as many stories through the history the worrier has to face the giants, giants of authorities, power and influence. It does not matter if you are a man or a woman, your destiny brings you to deep valleys some to knock you down, some to allow you to see life in a different way. All what matters is what is behind all of this. Sometimes I tell myself why the world even exist?
Like in ancients myths you have to fight with Gods of the world it is all about the upper hand over anything else. To see your self as a tiny grand of sand trying to find her way in such very mysterious world around her. Thinking of the multidimensional of a thing. Each network has vertices, edges and faces. Most of the journey you are dealing with faces, hardly to be in direct contact with edges that connect all the dimensions together to lead to the vertices, the top planner or checkmate. Each face either to bring you down, teach you a lesson or be a friend to walk with you no matter who you are. Yet, some faces do show up for specific task is meant either for good or bad. That is how you find yourself in the new world.
Counting your blessings in the midst of the journey, collecting stones from all shapes and sizes, stones of the lessons are being taught to you all the way. Nothing happen by accident. Racing within the unknown is not an easy journey. Can a woman survive trauma ? Can the world be part of healing or destruction? Can the mystery be solved and make life easier for her? by the end what is all of this about?
In the midst of each storm ray of hope shows up, something delightful happens, bringing you to be connected to the land that open its doors for me a a refugee to say you have a home now you are a citizen. Welcome home, you made it . having a home a land to belong to that is a new start of what you want to be within your new home, the breath of freedom of choice and face. Yet it is not only me my land open its door to, they open their doors for everyone even those who reminds me of my hurt and pain. Once I see anyone belongs to the past, the other side I lived in, I feel it all over my body. The pain , hurt and anger arouse to the surface again to remind me why I came here to this land at the first place. Flashbacks and a change of my state of mind occurs, trying to hold myself together and realize, Healing didn't happen yet, Iam not there yet, I say I forgive alot yet when it comes to real life, I realize I am not.
Day after dayIam telling myself Iam here now, Iam safe, no more fears, Iam no longer a personal property to anyone, Iam free Iam not afraid. Daily confirmation to stand on my solid ground Jesus Christ, giving myself as his servant and a daughter of the king of kings. Do words only sufficient or I want to do something more. The way I breathe, think and see the world around me. May when they come my way, God wants to tell me something , look at you, you made it so far a whole new person in Jesus Christ so don't be afraid , walk tall and strong even many things do not sound or look right.
Another question so why certain people come my way in the same same pattern and trying to constrain me, limit my life and why they act like that? Or think like that or do this or that ? They do not own me? Or because there are millions of Christians overseas being persecuted, am I being persecuted in a different way? This type of victimized mindset I don't want it. Even there is something does not feel right, I have to walk in the truth that Jesus set me free and not to destroy myself by thinking in this direction. Who accept me as I am, do not need and permission from anyone to accept me the way Iam. Who don't accept me, no matter who Iam or I do they won't accept me and I have no control over that. Who wants to see me in a certain way they will do whatever they could to confirm to the rest of the world this picture and I have no control over that either. Yes, there is good and bad in the world.Yes, there is always stereotyped of actions, stories, and behaviors. Yes there is a masking world what is seen is not the truth. Yes, we many times tend to be not honest toward each other due to different agendas and interests. Yet,I don't have to be part of all of that ,Iam who I am ,I get lost in my thoughts, I question everything.I analyse everything, I don't get anything in my life unless it is true, and proved its honesty. Yes I love to predict and do lots of psychs that is how my brain was created or I inherited this type of mind from my ancestors .Yes, I love exploring, experimenting and reading people and all this is a gift from God. He is showing me lots of great things how Mighty He is in creating us the way we are, Walking through His mysterious creation of making us all the way we are , is my greatest lesson to learn and be thankful for, diving within the deep of our complex mentalities even in the simplest things we do, Lord break me free to say it out and loud I am YOURS, by: Manal Eweis" The old Ancient Woman"
Tuesday, July 4, 2017
A new Story to be Told
Writing a story in a new perspective is not an easy task to be done in one of ten steps as it is now available on the internet. Some stories needs time and patience to be weaved in the right direction of life. Either it is your story or my story,God has the final word. Trust God with all your heart ,soul and mind.
Looking back seeing how far I walked and how far I have learnt on the other side of the world. Reaching a point don't tell me a story, walk me through it , by means let me live it. Introducing the shiny phase of a culture is not fair to make conclusions. Yes, this shiny part does exist , and shaping a huge part of laws, protocols and huge broad road map that will continue till our lord and savior comes back again, and yet that shiny phase forms only 1% of the whole world which relies on the 99% to keep them on top of the world.
Money births money it never dries out once you come to make that stone and brand ,the market operates itself . The older you get, the more money comes in, consumers put it in the front line of their daily life consumption. The Name markets itself. In between you have this ladder of personnel that have to keep this system running and here comes the contradiction of stories. Your position within this ladder that what makes sense to everything. The money does exist, the distribution process that what makes the socioeconomic gap exists all over the world. So it is not one nation philosophy or strategy. It all comes to the links in between the lines. Don't ask why this person get accepted or promoted and you are not. it all goes back to the inner dynamics within the association or corporate office who fits in most and who align with the vision of the organization and the system running the business. It is all a matter of fitting in . Blocks within the system not welcomed to misfits.
We live in a very competitive world, requires your readiness to go further than your limits, higher skills and preparedness. No second thought and keep the wheel running and if you don't fit in , you have to accept what has been offered to you as priority comes to who fits within the organization first then we don't know exactly about you ,sorry.......
Being highly educated is an old fashion as knowledge is changeable as well with the market. What you have may not fit in the today requirements of the market. Listening to many stories about fighting for lives, never give up difficulty and don't surrender. I found myself many times giving up, surrender and don't fight. Iam not a fighter Iam a human God made me the way Iam .Iam a thinker and seeking peace around me which has been received as a defeated spirit and in boxed in this frame and built a reputation of a whiny woman who is not standing strong to get what she wants .
When a picture is drawn about you, it won't change that is the reputation that walks with you wherever you go. That draws my attention about how we present ourselves into live and how others receive us can affect the path of your life and build this person you are not aware if she does exist or not.
So interesting that my quietness not to fight back and trying to keep my peace is received as an ignorance and inability to cope up with the world around me. Many indicators to tell me watch out you are being outcast, you are being in boxed in the frame of inability to perform in a high standard, inability to be treated equal or getting the job that may match the true you? Watch out for the alarms that as keeping sending their way to you, sorry you are not qualified. Sorry you are not fitting in the position that is posted, sorry we have priority to so and so, sorry you are not supposed to be here. All recommendations is to inbox me within a certain community not being free to choose what I want be within the new life God has given to me freely.
There is a voice that telling me, my story is a new version of me, giving away all the old and what has done is done and walking with God in a whole complete journey trusting Him with the out come, saying sorry fro each one wanted to take a piece of me and leaving me like a rag on the high way of homelessness and not being valued as a child of God. Sorry for each one who wanted me as a personal property not equally created and equally valued. Sorry for each one who abused and misused me not considering God's justice and fairness on earth as it is in heaven. Sorry for each one bullied me, called me names and hold me back and undermined my ability to be what God wants me to be. Iam not alone Iam walking with a Mighty God who reigns the earth and the heavens. I am a daughter of a living king who shows mercy upon my mistakes who forgives me unconditionally without blame. His breath is within me I am breathing His gracious goodness so don't judge me . I walk each step knowing that He is carrying me, watches over me and Iam His loyal servant wherever I go. All earthly things are a filthy rag for me, we make things, things don't make us and in all what we do we give Him all the glory .
Even I walk in the middle of the shadow of death, I know His is with me, He will never leave me nor forsaken me. He will allow me to tell a new version of a story to show His awesome power in creating a misfit like me. In God we trust. By : Manal Eweis" The Old Ancient Woman"
Looking back seeing how far I walked and how far I have learnt on the other side of the world. Reaching a point don't tell me a story, walk me through it , by means let me live it. Introducing the shiny phase of a culture is not fair to make conclusions. Yes, this shiny part does exist , and shaping a huge part of laws, protocols and huge broad road map that will continue till our lord and savior comes back again, and yet that shiny phase forms only 1% of the whole world which relies on the 99% to keep them on top of the world.
Money births money it never dries out once you come to make that stone and brand ,the market operates itself . The older you get, the more money comes in, consumers put it in the front line of their daily life consumption. The Name markets itself. In between you have this ladder of personnel that have to keep this system running and here comes the contradiction of stories. Your position within this ladder that what makes sense to everything. The money does exist, the distribution process that what makes the socioeconomic gap exists all over the world. So it is not one nation philosophy or strategy. It all comes to the links in between the lines. Don't ask why this person get accepted or promoted and you are not. it all goes back to the inner dynamics within the association or corporate office who fits in most and who align with the vision of the organization and the system running the business. It is all a matter of fitting in . Blocks within the system not welcomed to misfits.
We live in a very competitive world, requires your readiness to go further than your limits, higher skills and preparedness. No second thought and keep the wheel running and if you don't fit in , you have to accept what has been offered to you as priority comes to who fits within the organization first then we don't know exactly about you ,sorry.......
Being highly educated is an old fashion as knowledge is changeable as well with the market. What you have may not fit in the today requirements of the market. Listening to many stories about fighting for lives, never give up difficulty and don't surrender. I found myself many times giving up, surrender and don't fight. Iam not a fighter Iam a human God made me the way Iam .Iam a thinker and seeking peace around me which has been received as a defeated spirit and in boxed in this frame and built a reputation of a whiny woman who is not standing strong to get what she wants .
When a picture is drawn about you, it won't change that is the reputation that walks with you wherever you go. That draws my attention about how we present ourselves into live and how others receive us can affect the path of your life and build this person you are not aware if she does exist or not.
So interesting that my quietness not to fight back and trying to keep my peace is received as an ignorance and inability to cope up with the world around me. Many indicators to tell me watch out you are being outcast, you are being in boxed in the frame of inability to perform in a high standard, inability to be treated equal or getting the job that may match the true you? Watch out for the alarms that as keeping sending their way to you, sorry you are not qualified. Sorry you are not fitting in the position that is posted, sorry we have priority to so and so, sorry you are not supposed to be here. All recommendations is to inbox me within a certain community not being free to choose what I want be within the new life God has given to me freely.
There is a voice that telling me, my story is a new version of me, giving away all the old and what has done is done and walking with God in a whole complete journey trusting Him with the out come, saying sorry fro each one wanted to take a piece of me and leaving me like a rag on the high way of homelessness and not being valued as a child of God. Sorry for each one who wanted me as a personal property not equally created and equally valued. Sorry for each one who abused and misused me not considering God's justice and fairness on earth as it is in heaven. Sorry for each one bullied me, called me names and hold me back and undermined my ability to be what God wants me to be. Iam not alone Iam walking with a Mighty God who reigns the earth and the heavens. I am a daughter of a living king who shows mercy upon my mistakes who forgives me unconditionally without blame. His breath is within me I am breathing His gracious goodness so don't judge me . I walk each step knowing that He is carrying me, watches over me and Iam His loyal servant wherever I go. All earthly things are a filthy rag for me, we make things, things don't make us and in all what we do we give Him all the glory .
Even I walk in the middle of the shadow of death, I know His is with me, He will never leave me nor forsaken me. He will allow me to tell a new version of a story to show His awesome power in creating a misfit like me. In God we trust. By : Manal Eweis" The Old Ancient Woman"
Monday, June 26, 2017
Just A Stone
That's the best meditation time I could have when I visit a cemetery " From Ashes To Ashes, From Dust to Dust" and in between lies our whole journey here on earth till what is only left to make others remember us just a stone above your grave.
It doesn't matter what size is your stone or its nature even the most expensive ones can not bring you out of there where you can retell your story to tell the world how it looks like there, are you happy to be finally home or you wish to come back to redo or undo what already have been done ? Can each one on earth write down their life before they go home? Can we read each other story even the person is no longer there or is it ok to tell your story here where you are alive and you can find ears to hear you and take the lessons you have learnt seriously and be a lamp to one another to guide each other till we reach the end of the tunnel? or again we don't listen and believe one another while we are here on earth till the person is gone and here we live with our regrets that we didn't listen to them or pay attention to them while they are with us. Our self centered nature and the competency that push itself into our lives makes us running in a very bubbly world each focused on their agenda not aware of the spirit living among them till they go home.
It is a time of silence and getting wisdom from such sacred place that honor each soul lying under the stone. Sending my words to them and trying to listen to their wisdom and advice to me. From ashes to ashes what matters is what is between.
It is a good thing to remember where the flesh final home is and what stays alive is the soul that can roam around us , may send us messages from above to recall upon His name with faith that He listens who He gives ,takes away. He is giving us a free gift to honor and glorify His name while others use it for destroying one another and being controlled by their vain glory no matter who is around number 1 is them not anyone else.
Choosing to live a life of my choice to go deep into denying the flesh is not an easy route to take as this is not the norm around you, people may call you names or telling different stories about you and you find yourself in a big lie called life of the world. Either my way or no way.
To keep your faith you have to carry your own stone of perseverance , endurance and rising above all things are being said. Each word is a sowed into my heart not to beat me yet to remind me of the far end "Just A stone" no matter what are you trying to do, you have to keep your eyes aware of the devil scheme, he won't stop, faces may change, places may change yet the message is one, my way or no way. That is the race he started to prove his power on earth.
Being aware of his scheme doesn't allow me to sleep on my mission that race is not done yet, I belong to the only ONE who made the heaven and the earth. Our battle is against the flesh if we could win it ,heaven will be on earth, yet heaven does exist within you your body, mind and soul , sailing in His endless grace knowing that He owns it all we all are only guests whatever you are trying to do in between by the end will go back to Him and He is the Only ONE to say the final word.
As long as you believe He gave you this breath for a reason , don't make anything to stop you from believing or He will win. Keeping this as a reminder to yourself when you see the sparkle of the world surrounding you " From Ashes to Ashes, From dust to Dust" what is in between that matter to you that what are you going to do, have faith by: Manal Eweis "The Old Ancient Woman"
Thursday, June 22, 2017
Unappreciated Love(2)
We wake up in the morning, many thoughts are going on in our mind. Flashes from yesterday and old scenarios, this may take our focus on the present means today. We hear alot the past is the past, yet our spiritual warfare the enemy loves to push and press on the past buttons so you are not going anywhere. And that is our spiritual warfare that may confuse us and make us unable to think clear. Focusing on the enemy distractions takes away the foundation of which we have to remind us minute by minute with God's unconditional love for us and how He forgives us all, giving us our life, breath, chances to be at the present moment.
Spiritual warfare are not meant to built God's unconditional love for us on earth they are meant to allow certain agendas specially personal ones when the enemy knows what is ahead of you and you are not aware of it. Trying to snatch you away from what is ahead of you and taking it for themselves and here comes the rule of the reigning flesh. The world we live in. May I ask myself many times am I participating in this by giving the enemy the chance to distract me and keep me out of track by being open and allowing them to see my weaknesses to use them against me? And here comes another question why many ask you to be open and vulnerable while it is meant to break you down ? Is it a deceitful way to twist the truth?
In our endless competency world we live in, some tends to search for the vulnerable to use them as a tool to get what they want. In our modern world being vulnerable may not the right decision as you expose your life which is a precious gift from God and He put such precious gift freely into your hand to honor Him ,to reflect His Mighty image within you so am I seeking earthly strength or heavenly strength that is the choice that each one of us is taking each day they are here on earth.
So, the conflict of our choices will never even, the battle is ours not the enemy , we are the ones who give the enemy the chance to turn our lives upside down. That's true in the world of high standards , you won't be able to predict what is next and where are you going next. I have to put my armor of guard to see with the heart of God not the world and watch my steps where iam going and where my choices can lead me to.
Faces can change, yet the battle is the same, the weapons are the same, words are repeating themselves in different faces , stand still and know that Iam God doesn't mean to be passive , you are active to do what is right. You are active to speak the truth, be aware of the twisting words and scenarios as you already have been through this passage of clarity and confusion. There is a deep cry out now in your chest stop manipulating me and be straight forward . Stop pressing my weaknesses for in my weaknesses His strength reveals. Stop twisting and back stabling as He sees it all.
Seeking Heavenly strength doesn't depend on our physical ones, His work is different to show what we can not do on our own , Guard your heart and be fully confident in His unconditional love for you by: Manal Eweis "The Old Ancient Woman"
Spiritual warfare are not meant to built God's unconditional love for us on earth they are meant to allow certain agendas specially personal ones when the enemy knows what is ahead of you and you are not aware of it. Trying to snatch you away from what is ahead of you and taking it for themselves and here comes the rule of the reigning flesh. The world we live in. May I ask myself many times am I participating in this by giving the enemy the chance to distract me and keep me out of track by being open and allowing them to see my weaknesses to use them against me? And here comes another question why many ask you to be open and vulnerable while it is meant to break you down ? Is it a deceitful way to twist the truth?
In our endless competency world we live in, some tends to search for the vulnerable to use them as a tool to get what they want. In our modern world being vulnerable may not the right decision as you expose your life which is a precious gift from God and He put such precious gift freely into your hand to honor Him ,to reflect His Mighty image within you so am I seeking earthly strength or heavenly strength that is the choice that each one of us is taking each day they are here on earth.
So, the conflict of our choices will never even, the battle is ours not the enemy , we are the ones who give the enemy the chance to turn our lives upside down. That's true in the world of high standards , you won't be able to predict what is next and where are you going next. I have to put my armor of guard to see with the heart of God not the world and watch my steps where iam going and where my choices can lead me to.
Faces can change, yet the battle is the same, the weapons are the same, words are repeating themselves in different faces , stand still and know that Iam God doesn't mean to be passive , you are active to do what is right. You are active to speak the truth, be aware of the twisting words and scenarios as you already have been through this passage of clarity and confusion. There is a deep cry out now in your chest stop manipulating me and be straight forward . Stop pressing my weaknesses for in my weaknesses His strength reveals. Stop twisting and back stabling as He sees it all.
Seeking Heavenly strength doesn't depend on our physical ones, His work is different to show what we can not do on our own , Guard your heart and be fully confident in His unconditional love for you by: Manal Eweis "The Old Ancient Woman"
Friday, June 16, 2017
Call Me Crazy, Unwise , Fool or whatever comes to your mind then what........?
Another risk I have taken, quitting my secure Job with secure payment and benefits. A job was considered a huge life lesson in my life. It taught me many things about life. From being in boxed , doll life into a rough tough hands on activities. A job that led me to give away more and more and be centered on understanding my true self, meaning and purpose...
Yes, there are stations in our lives we reach a point of no where, 'No Entry' sign is surrounding you and no way here you have to turn away and change directions. In modern life we live ,GPS make it so easy to roam the places you don't know. Yet, what will happen when your GPS turn to be off and you have to find your way on your own. Unknown directions, places, names and signs you completely unaware of. How do you feel at this time? Some panic, crash, stress out and lose energy calling 911 won't help you further as they will give you directions and yet won't walk the way with you as an adult you are supposed to understand everything. you are supposed to be prepared , had your personal networking, circle of connections you know at least your family. To call someone you know or asking people on the way.
Yet what would you do if your cell don't work, is dead, no charger even almost no gas. Wow what a celebration of problem- solving and learning how to be prepared. Prayers, calling out the name of Jesus to be your fellow & celebrate the journey. First thing you have to recall each road you passed by, making mind map and new predictions or assumption of how to reach the point you were supposed to reach long long time. Aha, it is being said that mistakes help our brain cells to grow and generate new neurons. Ok, Putting every theory into action and try every possible out come. All you have to do is to try and never give up. Estimation plays a huge part of each assumption you make. All you need is to pay attention to the mistakes you have done before and remind yourself, yes here where I missed up. Here where I lost my way, Here where i got lost in each distraction around me.
Analyzing your points yet don't over analyse as time runs fast, time won't wait upon you. Time passes like vapor if you miss your point again time will pass and you will be late even reach your destination so late. That's the logic analysis. Each second counts. Each moment in your life counts.
Writing down your notes . Looking at them from time to time. Don't pity yourself as this is a tool of self destruction. Some actions may push you this way,don't give it a chance. Are you challenging yourself or the life you live. No my dear Iam walking with my Mighty Father who made the whole universe and created me in His image so if we are created in His image so how far we can reach. Put your fears away, trust Him the ONE who is watching over you. Yes, Iam in my mid life crisis trying to find a meaning and a purpose to my life, trying to find my way in the world in a way to honor Him and give Him all the glory to Him I do belong.
So starting over is letting me to understand truly what I was made for. What he meant for me. Yes, I am different from many around me yet there has to be respect for any differences we see in one another , as He didn't make us the same for a reason. Respecting our differences , give Him honor and appreciation for whatever He created within us.
So Letting Him to be my GPS is the new lesson that He is teaching me right now. Learning to trust in honoring Him in each step we take.... Yes, Iam starting over , doing the stinky job as my friend said one day , yet Iam not allowing any space not to honor God in whatever I do / Yet many will think this will lead to more breaking down to my pride and stubbornness, yet He sees me and watches over me.
Letting Him to be my GPS may don't make sense to the world around me, Yet he will make all the sense one day. Starting over with one vision that we were created in His image. What this will make sense for you, it is different from one another, so Iam not comparing myself to others, Iam letting my steps to be guided by Him , Iam blind, dummy, lack understanding and knowledge yet He is my master and teacher He is so patient with His child to teach her the lessons He wants her to learn and absorb, so let it be ,by:Manal Eweis " The Old Ancient Woman"
Yes, there are stations in our lives we reach a point of no where, 'No Entry' sign is surrounding you and no way here you have to turn away and change directions. In modern life we live ,GPS make it so easy to roam the places you don't know. Yet, what will happen when your GPS turn to be off and you have to find your way on your own. Unknown directions, places, names and signs you completely unaware of. How do you feel at this time? Some panic, crash, stress out and lose energy calling 911 won't help you further as they will give you directions and yet won't walk the way with you as an adult you are supposed to understand everything. you are supposed to be prepared , had your personal networking, circle of connections you know at least your family. To call someone you know or asking people on the way.
Yet what would you do if your cell don't work, is dead, no charger even almost no gas. Wow what a celebration of problem- solving and learning how to be prepared. Prayers, calling out the name of Jesus to be your fellow & celebrate the journey. First thing you have to recall each road you passed by, making mind map and new predictions or assumption of how to reach the point you were supposed to reach long long time. Aha, it is being said that mistakes help our brain cells to grow and generate new neurons. Ok, Putting every theory into action and try every possible out come. All you have to do is to try and never give up. Estimation plays a huge part of each assumption you make. All you need is to pay attention to the mistakes you have done before and remind yourself, yes here where I missed up. Here where I lost my way, Here where i got lost in each distraction around me.
Analyzing your points yet don't over analyse as time runs fast, time won't wait upon you. Time passes like vapor if you miss your point again time will pass and you will be late even reach your destination so late. That's the logic analysis. Each second counts. Each moment in your life counts.
Writing down your notes . Looking at them from time to time. Don't pity yourself as this is a tool of self destruction. Some actions may push you this way,don't give it a chance. Are you challenging yourself or the life you live. No my dear Iam walking with my Mighty Father who made the whole universe and created me in His image so if we are created in His image so how far we can reach. Put your fears away, trust Him the ONE who is watching over you. Yes, Iam in my mid life crisis trying to find a meaning and a purpose to my life, trying to find my way in the world in a way to honor Him and give Him all the glory to Him I do belong.
So starting over is letting me to understand truly what I was made for. What he meant for me. Yes, I am different from many around me yet there has to be respect for any differences we see in one another , as He didn't make us the same for a reason. Respecting our differences , give Him honor and appreciation for whatever He created within us.
So Letting Him to be my GPS is the new lesson that He is teaching me right now. Learning to trust in honoring Him in each step we take.... Yes, Iam starting over , doing the stinky job as my friend said one day , yet Iam not allowing any space not to honor God in whatever I do / Yet many will think this will lead to more breaking down to my pride and stubbornness, yet He sees me and watches over me.
Letting Him to be my GPS may don't make sense to the world around me, Yet he will make all the sense one day. Starting over with one vision that we were created in His image. What this will make sense for you, it is different from one another, so Iam not comparing myself to others, Iam letting my steps to be guided by Him , Iam blind, dummy, lack understanding and knowledge yet He is my master and teacher He is so patient with His child to teach her the lessons He wants her to learn and absorb, so let it be ,by:Manal Eweis " The Old Ancient Woman"
Wednesday, June 14, 2017
Unappreciated Love
These words hit me at a sudden this morning. No wonder why they are coming to me now. A clear interpretation to the love of God. Do we as humans really aware of His love to us and how far and deep can this love which is given freely can lead our lives on daily basis, moment by moment or we carry our baggage and keeping filling it till it takes away our sense of God's love into us?
Looking at simple routines through our day, on small scale and large scale, you notice that each behavior , attitude, reaction and action is based on what we insert against one another depending on history, political, socioeconomically and interests. This take away the true light of God's unconditional love to us. We get deep in the flesh, get deep in the outside forgetting the true source of the light within.Wait a minute, excuse me this light won't pay my bills, won't help me to live the style I aspire to live, won't put food on the table or secure a roof over my head or get me the spouse of my dream, won't let me take vacations and travel the world, won't get me this or that and here the baggage becomes more and more heavier that make our vision so blurry to see God's love and what does it mean or truly help us to live our day in peace.
The world took our attention from purpose and meaning and turned our lives into a very radical materialistic type of life that when you meet with a person is different from that you start your judging, undermining ,devalue and never appreciate them as a person the way they are.
World standards become the true purpose of humans are living around you. the equation to live even a simple life is becoming more and more harder that leads to question yourself, what life is all about? Will my will to have simple humble life , be ridiculed or am I misunderstanding the equation from the beginning? What does it mean to be born with a heart that is washed by the grace of God? and how you take this heart and live in the world and be considered normal not something else? Again what am I missing? Do we still believe in the unconditional love of God without a question or due to the heavy baggage of unhealthy relationships that are taken as norm and unable to differentiate between the good and the bad, all are bad apples , nothing is purely considered?
This morning was a hit for me, there were many thing God wanted to teach me to reach this point of understanding. Awareness, knowledge are two powerful key life operators.
As a woman I had no decision to be created this way or look like this or think like this ,it is all God's creation. Realizing that how you look, think , act can put you in a very challenging journey, make me question what do we really believe within ourselves are we created in God's image and to be honored or we are tools to be used in the flesh , how you wear or put on can determine how the world will receive you. Can it be a true life that remembering God's creation and we have no choice in that ? All these thoughts came to my mind and then I told myself again wait a minute, you are the one who determine how the other treat you, if you allow yourself to be swiped under the mat then don't blame any one. My ignorance that led me to such a way of thinking. Your action, your presence that determine how the world will receive you. Paying attention everyone is packed with a baggage about one another. So, stop and think, be aware that a new equation has to be written on how our hearts may be created differently and that forms minds and lives. It is all starts with the heart not the mind while you depend mostly on the mind. May logic make sense yet our baggage determine the actions and results.
Unappreciated love is a new topic that will lead me to represent how we as humans due to the chaotic overwhelmed styles may blind us to depreciate God's love and they way He created us differently making the world our God not God Himself. Seeking deep understanding to this core point that controls how our lives may go this way or that way.By: Manal Eweis "The Old Ancient Woman"
Looking at simple routines through our day, on small scale and large scale, you notice that each behavior , attitude, reaction and action is based on what we insert against one another depending on history, political, socioeconomically and interests. This take away the true light of God's unconditional love to us. We get deep in the flesh, get deep in the outside forgetting the true source of the light within.Wait a minute, excuse me this light won't pay my bills, won't help me to live the style I aspire to live, won't put food on the table or secure a roof over my head or get me the spouse of my dream, won't let me take vacations and travel the world, won't get me this or that and here the baggage becomes more and more heavier that make our vision so blurry to see God's love and what does it mean or truly help us to live our day in peace.
The world took our attention from purpose and meaning and turned our lives into a very radical materialistic type of life that when you meet with a person is different from that you start your judging, undermining ,devalue and never appreciate them as a person the way they are.
World standards become the true purpose of humans are living around you. the equation to live even a simple life is becoming more and more harder that leads to question yourself, what life is all about? Will my will to have simple humble life , be ridiculed or am I misunderstanding the equation from the beginning? What does it mean to be born with a heart that is washed by the grace of God? and how you take this heart and live in the world and be considered normal not something else? Again what am I missing? Do we still believe in the unconditional love of God without a question or due to the heavy baggage of unhealthy relationships that are taken as norm and unable to differentiate between the good and the bad, all are bad apples , nothing is purely considered?
This morning was a hit for me, there were many thing God wanted to teach me to reach this point of understanding. Awareness, knowledge are two powerful key life operators.
As a woman I had no decision to be created this way or look like this or think like this ,it is all God's creation. Realizing that how you look, think , act can put you in a very challenging journey, make me question what do we really believe within ourselves are we created in God's image and to be honored or we are tools to be used in the flesh , how you wear or put on can determine how the world will receive you. Can it be a true life that remembering God's creation and we have no choice in that ? All these thoughts came to my mind and then I told myself again wait a minute, you are the one who determine how the other treat you, if you allow yourself to be swiped under the mat then don't blame any one. My ignorance that led me to such a way of thinking. Your action, your presence that determine how the world will receive you. Paying attention everyone is packed with a baggage about one another. So, stop and think, be aware that a new equation has to be written on how our hearts may be created differently and that forms minds and lives. It is all starts with the heart not the mind while you depend mostly on the mind. May logic make sense yet our baggage determine the actions and results.
Unappreciated love is a new topic that will lead me to represent how we as humans due to the chaotic overwhelmed styles may blind us to depreciate God's love and they way He created us differently making the world our God not God Himself. Seeking deep understanding to this core point that controls how our lives may go this way or that way.By: Manal Eweis "The Old Ancient Woman"
Monday, May 29, 2017
To Live Strong Lead Life
for sure our lessons come from our failures. They teach us things that we hardly can see with the naked eyes. It is the process that wraps you in experiences some you liked to start by yourself ,others you were exposed to. Who on earth haven not dreamed so much. You imagined yourself to be what you want to be and you decide to go for it. What does it take only the first step. With a naive perspective you go for it. Like a child who wants each to and not aware about how much is it? is it affordable? Do you know how to use it or even how it is made? How long it could last? does it suite you for each stage of your life? Is it a long live tool to be used and help you to function properly in life? None of these questions have been occurred to you. All you got is the child stubbornness to get what she wants. This is the child nature or this is how it comes to my mind when we, adults, try to do things without any considerations or planning.
We go with our feelings without any experience or asking questions before we step in. Yes, it happens when you work in life with your heart. Then you go through the cycle and you get your heart broken. Feeling sad that you allowed this to happen and how come as an adult you allowed your heart this means feelings and emotions blind you from seeking deep understanding whether it suits you to do it or not. Self blaming, punishing yourself , feeling down, doubting and questioning yourself over and over. And by time you will move to another experience and the lessons keep repeating themselves in different shapes and colors and yet, you didn't get it , not realizing the repetitive pattern as you allowed again your heart , feelings and emotions to control the situation and they can see this within you, using this to manipulate and do what they want do and no care for you or your existence in this life. Do not blame any one but yourself , move on
Waking the next day with broken heart, being apart and not feeling the surroundings the same as before. Trying to hold on, telling yourself try again one more time and here the waves are stronger than you and they knock you down with a cheer and loud voice, we got you again , come on baby one more round. Wrestling with powers can not get you anywhere but the ground.
It is not the game of co-existence, living or being who you are acknowledging the differences God made within us. It is not the routine to be followed to do the tasks. It is not the respect of your being within the universe. it is the world of complex identities where you do not know who you are dealing with. It is not a matter of life , live and let me live. it is the complex layer of revenge and power conflict. You are a threat to me and you have to be down. It is the conflict of surviving to get to the big dream of your life, sweeping any one in the way, using any thing can get you there. It is not the peaceful life you are seeking to be on earth. No my dear there are tens and tens of multi-layers agendas and your fault that you exist in the place and you belong to a certain race.
Do you get it or not yet, the imbalance of powers lead to a long live lived conflicts and battles. Sometimes you understand it , sometimes you do not as it is beyond your limits. Leading you to a serial of sufferings and weaknesses, screaming no this is not the life I want. Do you get it. Only in your head or you already see it, live it and no way out to be free.
We can be a live in the world, yet we are not free. Controlled by the world system. Controlled by power conflicts. Controlled by the stigmas that put onto us for we are different seeking the life that God meant for us to be, not being understood or even we can trust.
And here comes the lesson Iam trying to find in my life. There are three cornerstones to live and lead a strong life: Trust, Faithfulness and Honesty . In each one of them you can experience a multitude of heartbreaks till you find them if you could. As if you are looking for heaven on earth. These three are the glue for a healthy long life, no hidden agendas or conflict of powers. Live and let me live became a hard equation to be found in the world of complex identities controlled by the world system and distract us from our main purpose on earth to make a better life. To sow the seeds of goodness and witnessing His endless grace without complaining and betraying one another. Sorry I can not compromise , I have one life and I have to fight till I find it a life filled with meaning and purpose not fake interface or lies behind,By: Manal Eweis The Old ancient Woman
We go with our feelings without any experience or asking questions before we step in. Yes, it happens when you work in life with your heart. Then you go through the cycle and you get your heart broken. Feeling sad that you allowed this to happen and how come as an adult you allowed your heart this means feelings and emotions blind you from seeking deep understanding whether it suits you to do it or not. Self blaming, punishing yourself , feeling down, doubting and questioning yourself over and over. And by time you will move to another experience and the lessons keep repeating themselves in different shapes and colors and yet, you didn't get it , not realizing the repetitive pattern as you allowed again your heart , feelings and emotions to control the situation and they can see this within you, using this to manipulate and do what they want do and no care for you or your existence in this life. Do not blame any one but yourself , move on
Waking the next day with broken heart, being apart and not feeling the surroundings the same as before. Trying to hold on, telling yourself try again one more time and here the waves are stronger than you and they knock you down with a cheer and loud voice, we got you again , come on baby one more round. Wrestling with powers can not get you anywhere but the ground.
It is not the game of co-existence, living or being who you are acknowledging the differences God made within us. It is not the routine to be followed to do the tasks. It is not the respect of your being within the universe. it is the world of complex identities where you do not know who you are dealing with. It is not a matter of life , live and let me live. it is the complex layer of revenge and power conflict. You are a threat to me and you have to be down. It is the conflict of surviving to get to the big dream of your life, sweeping any one in the way, using any thing can get you there. It is not the peaceful life you are seeking to be on earth. No my dear there are tens and tens of multi-layers agendas and your fault that you exist in the place and you belong to a certain race.
Do you get it or not yet, the imbalance of powers lead to a long live lived conflicts and battles. Sometimes you understand it , sometimes you do not as it is beyond your limits. Leading you to a serial of sufferings and weaknesses, screaming no this is not the life I want. Do you get it. Only in your head or you already see it, live it and no way out to be free.
We can be a live in the world, yet we are not free. Controlled by the world system. Controlled by power conflicts. Controlled by the stigmas that put onto us for we are different seeking the life that God meant for us to be, not being understood or even we can trust.
And here comes the lesson Iam trying to find in my life. There are three cornerstones to live and lead a strong life: Trust, Faithfulness and Honesty . In each one of them you can experience a multitude of heartbreaks till you find them if you could. As if you are looking for heaven on earth. These three are the glue for a healthy long life, no hidden agendas or conflict of powers. Live and let me live became a hard equation to be found in the world of complex identities controlled by the world system and distract us from our main purpose on earth to make a better life. To sow the seeds of goodness and witnessing His endless grace without complaining and betraying one another. Sorry I can not compromise , I have one life and I have to fight till I find it a life filled with meaning and purpose not fake interface or lies behind,By: Manal Eweis The Old ancient Woman
Saturday, May 27, 2017
If Life throws you a lemon.....................
Yup, that is the first thing that came to my mind. Asking yourself what is going on. Being hit by lemons that make your vision dazzle and letting you wondering. Oh! My God what is going on? Can words be trapped in our lips hardly to express? Can vision be turned upside down, waking you up from daydreaming and rosy world? Can your mind be shifted to make you question over and over what is going on? Yes, who can avoid such times that allow fractions to process different results.
Asking myself if getting deeper is not a request within the modern world? If I feel something and can not express it so why the question from the first place? Adjusting path ways will look like rags within a fine fabric to make it different while it doesn't make sense.
Squaring your thoughts may result in doubling them. Going up and down trying to solve the infinite equation with no directions or right instructions or even understanding of what is next. All you do asking what is going on? Going in circles, going back to the same old patterns has no value to add or helping you to move on. The old is coming again and again and here you forget what has been proven that didn't or won't work.
This time is different more understanding allows you to see the world and the life around you in a different lens. Waking up from the comma of unworthiness, shame and neglect. Wake up it is almost Four and half decades on earth and what you did has no worth. Wake up come back to the earth and let it go of the old. Our days are numbered and nothing can change that. Allowing shadows to control your thoughts, day and night does not make sense.
Tune up with the universe, the beauty that is created and no one can take this out or make it something else. Through pains and sorrows here His light shines in, carrying you to bring you back to your sanity and helping you to cross another bridge. Life has no meaning if we compromise our existence for meaningless drama or fears to shackle our steps. The world is so big it never meant to trap one another for drops of dust or gold. Walk away, carry your load and embrace the cross. The world is so wide to lose our precious life for hate or revenge. Walk away and seek Him The ONE who made the whole universe for you to explore to navigate through the beauty within.
Who sees the world with the lens of conflict and hate will never change, making life like a massacre the blood will never end. There is no peace in there. There is no light, There is nothing that we can count on as it is a slow death for innocent souls on the earth.
Climbing your mountain of faith is not an easy process. Seeking to fly on eagle wings, bringing peace into the universe. Sadness comes natural when we are down and can't fight anymore. The body is declaring its tiredness of meaningless hate and revenge. No more tears to be shed all you see is His grace and the deep breath He created within you for a reason and nothing else make sense.
Times of questioning the pain you live is nothing but another miracle He is preparing you for so always remind yourself " If life throws you a lemon, make the best sweetest delicious lemonade." Express His presence within you and stand for the life He is breathing in within you for a reason and the answer you will experience will truly make sense. Wake up for a new day looking for hope and never turn your face away from Him.By: Manal Eweis
Asking myself if getting deeper is not a request within the modern world? If I feel something and can not express it so why the question from the first place? Adjusting path ways will look like rags within a fine fabric to make it different while it doesn't make sense.
Squaring your thoughts may result in doubling them. Going up and down trying to solve the infinite equation with no directions or right instructions or even understanding of what is next. All you do asking what is going on? Going in circles, going back to the same old patterns has no value to add or helping you to move on. The old is coming again and again and here you forget what has been proven that didn't or won't work.
This time is different more understanding allows you to see the world and the life around you in a different lens. Waking up from the comma of unworthiness, shame and neglect. Wake up it is almost Four and half decades on earth and what you did has no worth. Wake up come back to the earth and let it go of the old. Our days are numbered and nothing can change that. Allowing shadows to control your thoughts, day and night does not make sense.
Tune up with the universe, the beauty that is created and no one can take this out or make it something else. Through pains and sorrows here His light shines in, carrying you to bring you back to your sanity and helping you to cross another bridge. Life has no meaning if we compromise our existence for meaningless drama or fears to shackle our steps. The world is so big it never meant to trap one another for drops of dust or gold. Walk away, carry your load and embrace the cross. The world is so wide to lose our precious life for hate or revenge. Walk away and seek Him The ONE who made the whole universe for you to explore to navigate through the beauty within.
Who sees the world with the lens of conflict and hate will never change, making life like a massacre the blood will never end. There is no peace in there. There is no light, There is nothing that we can count on as it is a slow death for innocent souls on the earth.
Climbing your mountain of faith is not an easy process. Seeking to fly on eagle wings, bringing peace into the universe. Sadness comes natural when we are down and can't fight anymore. The body is declaring its tiredness of meaningless hate and revenge. No more tears to be shed all you see is His grace and the deep breath He created within you for a reason and nothing else make sense.
Times of questioning the pain you live is nothing but another miracle He is preparing you for so always remind yourself " If life throws you a lemon, make the best sweetest delicious lemonade." Express His presence within you and stand for the life He is breathing in within you for a reason and the answer you will experience will truly make sense. Wake up for a new day looking for hope and never turn your face away from Him.By: Manal Eweis
Tuesday, May 2, 2017
Emptiness
What can comes to your mind when I mention the word emptiness? It may mean to you so many things, no storage, no fulfillment of something you desire or like or working on yet this irritating wandering sense of life is surrounding you wherever you go? Is it due to lack of something or having everything anyone else can wish for and you don't desire any more?
Emptiness this word that fills each one package despite whatever they have? is it due to the lack of meaning or value of anything we have? whatever you get in this life, is no enough there is always this lack that urge you to do, nothing but doing, floating in the bubble of emptiness.
Emptiness led us to the dryness of true love and true value. Emptiness led us to a very rough tough feelings toward the life around us . I do not see growth in such arena if Emptiness overcome your life, it will take you to the senseless motion of routines that what we call survival. You do what you do only to keep yourself alive.
Can you imagine with me what world emptiness would like to take you to? Iam sure it is not the route you would like to walk through. Yet, each one of us has time to walk through emptiness when you do things that may allow you to question what is the purpose of this or that? Does it add value to my day, or even the minute Iam present in the world right now? Was it for the common good or it was about my hunger for more this desire of fulfillment and the need of more and more yet i didn't sense any of it?
This chapter of emptiness may consume good time of our precious life that is why it is important to identify the red flags that lead to such emptiness to consume our time on earth. Once you identify them , then bring them to awareness, don't try to suppress them as they will allow this chapter to dig deep to the roots and change everything upside down that is you the main asset in this life, you will be controlled by it and it will tell you what to do each second of your life ,so you will become a sweeper of illusion not a true human life.
Can you see how far emptiness can drag you to, to see the unwanted to wanted , the not needed to a must and when something become a must it blinds us to see the true value of life around us, nothing but negativity , jealousy, covetousness and all what is against the fruit of spirit and this is not a welcomed soil i want it to myself or anyone on earth.
May the LORD fill your emptiness,
May The LORD fill your days with grace,
May the LORD guide your steps and lead your heart,
I can not do it on my own, He is there to help
That is why Iam proud to call Him my God , by: Manal Eweis " The Old Ancient Woman"
Emptiness this word that fills each one package despite whatever they have? is it due to the lack of meaning or value of anything we have? whatever you get in this life, is no enough there is always this lack that urge you to do, nothing but doing, floating in the bubble of emptiness.
Emptiness led us to the dryness of true love and true value. Emptiness led us to a very rough tough feelings toward the life around us . I do not see growth in such arena if Emptiness overcome your life, it will take you to the senseless motion of routines that what we call survival. You do what you do only to keep yourself alive.
Can you imagine with me what world emptiness would like to take you to? Iam sure it is not the route you would like to walk through. Yet, each one of us has time to walk through emptiness when you do things that may allow you to question what is the purpose of this or that? Does it add value to my day, or even the minute Iam present in the world right now? Was it for the common good or it was about my hunger for more this desire of fulfillment and the need of more and more yet i didn't sense any of it?
This chapter of emptiness may consume good time of our precious life that is why it is important to identify the red flags that lead to such emptiness to consume our time on earth. Once you identify them , then bring them to awareness, don't try to suppress them as they will allow this chapter to dig deep to the roots and change everything upside down that is you the main asset in this life, you will be controlled by it and it will tell you what to do each second of your life ,so you will become a sweeper of illusion not a true human life.
Can you see how far emptiness can drag you to, to see the unwanted to wanted , the not needed to a must and when something become a must it blinds us to see the true value of life around us, nothing but negativity , jealousy, covetousness and all what is against the fruit of spirit and this is not a welcomed soil i want it to myself or anyone on earth.
May the LORD fill your emptiness,
May The LORD fill your days with grace,
May the LORD guide your steps and lead your heart,
I can not do it on my own, He is there to help
That is why Iam proud to call Him my God , by: Manal Eweis " The Old Ancient Woman"
Saturday, April 29, 2017
Unexpected Changes
Most of us go through life with a certain pattern they either know through their upbringing or they acquired it from the surroundings. Media has reshaped a revolutionary change of the mind-set. It is easy with a click of a button to search the unlimited options of human mind creativity and lots of non- related realities.
From the lenses of my observations the true drastic change start to happen at the age of 13-35. The age of seeking identity and a bright future walking with the mentalities of superheros and sometimes the dark side of the evolution. At this set group of age mostly the main focus is to get what you want, anyway possible, it doesn't matter it is ethical or non-ethical. I want this so I have to have it. With too much patterns are repeating themselves. High school dirty games, being sassy, or dramatic and many times sneaky specially with those who don't pay attention to such type of games. And all this doesn't have a relation if you are a believer or not. The game is who can get it.
It maybe the race of being under the light spot and being important. Or it is the race of seeking power. Sometimes it is just the way it is when you play it dirty this means you know the game and you are on the top of everyone around you.
When you are surrounded with an environment like this either they will sweep you under the rug or here stands some thing unexpected to happen. Normally you start with the question what if...? many think that this is a status of doubting and not trusting God for what He is doing into your life and here I have a stand What if is a thinking tool that allows you to put all the options toward the possibilities that could ever happen to the current situation so you are mirroring all possibilities without any prejudice since majority of our life decisions are based on following the same patterns that we either grow up with or acquired from the surroundings. What if is your co-thinker to reconsider everything in the current situation and this why God gave you a mind in His image and if we look carefully at Genesis 1-3 we will see this question is proposed in each detail of creation it is all based on possibilities no fixed results.
The Second question is What Wows.....? you don't know whether all the possibilities to change the stereotype of patterns that keep hindering humanity from realizing the power of our creation unless you try them with in a time frame and the right situations that could give you a push towards practical solutions or a new successful pattern? when you are focused on making a change within the old patterns, don't expect an embrace for that from everybody as this as if you are tearing the walls of protection of their stereotype patterns that have been done for years and years no matter how many souls they sweep on the way as long as they are the top of everyone else. So bringing the unexpected change is not about sweeping people under the rug. It is the acknowledgement of God's greatest gift to us that is our mind. If we intentionally look at humans as an image of God not allowing the sins of the world try to put within us to look at humans as a flesh that will make a radical change of how things can go for the benefit of all humanity.
Unfortunately most of the world is controlled by the stereotype of walking in the flesh not the spirit. Yet, this is the endless challenge and the price we have to pay since we live in the world. You can not force the world to see life in your scope walking in the spirit , you can not force the world to see you the way God sees you. You can not make everybody align with what is in your heart and mind. Yet it is possible to create the change within you first. So you are your own experimental sample of the change that you want to bring into the world you love to see.
Here we come to the question # 3 What Works...? In the process of examining all possibilities, they will show you what works and what does not. Again you do this intentionally not spontaneously. Believe in your intentions and what can the human mind reach within the unlimited creation of God's grace. Believe that one day you will be the change that you will love to see in the world around you. Believe that He created you in His image not in vain. Trust Him and keep moving by: Manal Eweis" The Old Ancient Woman?
From the lenses of my observations the true drastic change start to happen at the age of 13-35. The age of seeking identity and a bright future walking with the mentalities of superheros and sometimes the dark side of the evolution. At this set group of age mostly the main focus is to get what you want, anyway possible, it doesn't matter it is ethical or non-ethical. I want this so I have to have it. With too much patterns are repeating themselves. High school dirty games, being sassy, or dramatic and many times sneaky specially with those who don't pay attention to such type of games. And all this doesn't have a relation if you are a believer or not. The game is who can get it.
It maybe the race of being under the light spot and being important. Or it is the race of seeking power. Sometimes it is just the way it is when you play it dirty this means you know the game and you are on the top of everyone around you.
When you are surrounded with an environment like this either they will sweep you under the rug or here stands some thing unexpected to happen. Normally you start with the question what if...? many think that this is a status of doubting and not trusting God for what He is doing into your life and here I have a stand What if is a thinking tool that allows you to put all the options toward the possibilities that could ever happen to the current situation so you are mirroring all possibilities without any prejudice since majority of our life decisions are based on following the same patterns that we either grow up with or acquired from the surroundings. What if is your co-thinker to reconsider everything in the current situation and this why God gave you a mind in His image and if we look carefully at Genesis 1-3 we will see this question is proposed in each detail of creation it is all based on possibilities no fixed results.
The Second question is What Wows.....? you don't know whether all the possibilities to change the stereotype of patterns that keep hindering humanity from realizing the power of our creation unless you try them with in a time frame and the right situations that could give you a push towards practical solutions or a new successful pattern? when you are focused on making a change within the old patterns, don't expect an embrace for that from everybody as this as if you are tearing the walls of protection of their stereotype patterns that have been done for years and years no matter how many souls they sweep on the way as long as they are the top of everyone else. So bringing the unexpected change is not about sweeping people under the rug. It is the acknowledgement of God's greatest gift to us that is our mind. If we intentionally look at humans as an image of God not allowing the sins of the world try to put within us to look at humans as a flesh that will make a radical change of how things can go for the benefit of all humanity.
Unfortunately most of the world is controlled by the stereotype of walking in the flesh not the spirit. Yet, this is the endless challenge and the price we have to pay since we live in the world. You can not force the world to see life in your scope walking in the spirit , you can not force the world to see you the way God sees you. You can not make everybody align with what is in your heart and mind. Yet it is possible to create the change within you first. So you are your own experimental sample of the change that you want to bring into the world you love to see.
Here we come to the question # 3 What Works...? In the process of examining all possibilities, they will show you what works and what does not. Again you do this intentionally not spontaneously. Believe in your intentions and what can the human mind reach within the unlimited creation of God's grace. Believe that one day you will be the change that you will love to see in the world around you. Believe that He created you in His image not in vain. Trust Him and keep moving by: Manal Eweis" The Old Ancient Woman?
Sunday, April 23, 2017
The Blessing of Life
The month of April always brings such unexplained joy within my soul. All I see is the beauty that surrounding me everywhere I go. The green, the colorful flowers and plants all reflect the indescribable grace of God. Looking at each life I see in front of me, I see the holiness that lay behind many phases of everyday life.
April comes with that wonder that suffering is nothing but something to remind you who is in control. It proves to you one thing The mighty power of our creator who made you.
He breathed life within you not to shed tears or feel the negative echo of unfaithful voices or the echo of who is not able to see what you see. So interesting to breath God's miraculous wonder that is called the blessing of life. Yes. waking up each day is a blessing, a renewal to His faithful promise to give you life a new life. A blank day and made you the author of it. See how He is giving you the power to write your own daily page. What a freedom is taken for granted and forgetting who is in control of it all.
Call me unrealistic, selfish, prideful, ignorant, unqualified , unworthy , stubborn, independent , it doesn't matter as I signed a holy contract with my Creator to lead me and guide me to His will for my life. Whatever He reveals to me or leads me to do I am completely filled with joy, knowing who is in control and thanking Him for His trust in me that is all I want.
Watching pain in each part of the earth , tells nothing but to stand out and acknowledge THE ONE who blessed you with life. No a fancy life. Yet. it is life filled with gratitude and thankfulness. A life that knows the value of being alive. A life that witness how sicknesses can take this life away, leaving us lifeless without a new sheet to create or a story to be told.
The enemy seeks your sadness, your pain and suffering. Yet, God washes everything away by focusing your sight on His magnificent creation. it is all around. Thank Him the ONE who took the time and the heart to do it all. Yes, He did it all and blessed you with the life that is in your hand daily so my dear human are you aware of this blessing? Do you give the opportunity to the enemy to keep your heart and sight away of this blessing ? Are you giving your enemy the chance to create the foggy image in your life?
Please do not let Him do that and remember the ONE in control. He is the ONE who brings us all to life. Look at His creation and be the monk in His paradise. Each leaf and petal or seed declaring His Mighty name with delight.Knowing that the blessing of life is from Him to give us joy . Untouchable joy, yet everyone can see it without a deny.
From a drop of water to the deepest seas,
All witness God's creation within His endless grace,
Watching the spreading life all over the earth,
Without any hesitation or even a rethink
Soldiers of God's almighty army ,
Caring for His creation without a word,
Look at the beautiful skies, meadows
of gorgeous flowers and trees,
Creatures are living God's endless grace.
Watching the world with a different eye,
an eye of gratefulness , shameless open arms
to embrace each day ,
The creation of our loving God. By Manal Eweis" The Old Ancient Woman"
I'll keep reflecting my mind and never hesitate to share God's blessing of life in each day is given to me.
" I, The LORD , have called thee in righteousness, and will hold thine hand, and will keep thee, and give thee for a covenant of the people, for the light of the nations, To open the blind eyes, to bring out the prisoners from the prison, and those who sit in the darkness out of the prison house. " Isaiah 42: 6-7
April comes with that wonder that suffering is nothing but something to remind you who is in control. It proves to you one thing The mighty power of our creator who made you.
He breathed life within you not to shed tears or feel the negative echo of unfaithful voices or the echo of who is not able to see what you see. So interesting to breath God's miraculous wonder that is called the blessing of life. Yes. waking up each day is a blessing, a renewal to His faithful promise to give you life a new life. A blank day and made you the author of it. See how He is giving you the power to write your own daily page. What a freedom is taken for granted and forgetting who is in control of it all.
Call me unrealistic, selfish, prideful, ignorant, unqualified , unworthy , stubborn, independent , it doesn't matter as I signed a holy contract with my Creator to lead me and guide me to His will for my life. Whatever He reveals to me or leads me to do I am completely filled with joy, knowing who is in control and thanking Him for His trust in me that is all I want.
Watching pain in each part of the earth , tells nothing but to stand out and acknowledge THE ONE who blessed you with life. No a fancy life. Yet. it is life filled with gratitude and thankfulness. A life that knows the value of being alive. A life that witness how sicknesses can take this life away, leaving us lifeless without a new sheet to create or a story to be told.
The enemy seeks your sadness, your pain and suffering. Yet, God washes everything away by focusing your sight on His magnificent creation. it is all around. Thank Him the ONE who took the time and the heart to do it all. Yes, He did it all and blessed you with the life that is in your hand daily so my dear human are you aware of this blessing? Do you give the opportunity to the enemy to keep your heart and sight away of this blessing ? Are you giving your enemy the chance to create the foggy image in your life?
Please do not let Him do that and remember the ONE in control. He is the ONE who brings us all to life. Look at His creation and be the monk in His paradise. Each leaf and petal or seed declaring His Mighty name with delight.Knowing that the blessing of life is from Him to give us joy . Untouchable joy, yet everyone can see it without a deny.
From a drop of water to the deepest seas,
All witness God's creation within His endless grace,
Watching the spreading life all over the earth,
Without any hesitation or even a rethink
Soldiers of God's almighty army ,
Caring for His creation without a word,
Look at the beautiful skies, meadows
of gorgeous flowers and trees,
Creatures are living God's endless grace.
Watching the world with a different eye,
an eye of gratefulness , shameless open arms
to embrace each day ,
The creation of our loving God. By Manal Eweis" The Old Ancient Woman"
I'll keep reflecting my mind and never hesitate to share God's blessing of life in each day is given to me.
" I, The LORD , have called thee in righteousness, and will hold thine hand, and will keep thee, and give thee for a covenant of the people, for the light of the nations, To open the blind eyes, to bring out the prisoners from the prison, and those who sit in the darkness out of the prison house. " Isaiah 42: 6-7
Saturday, April 15, 2017
New Breathed Life Is Given
wondering why humans scattered in a million direction with things to do on earth, being away from their spirituality and believing in the seen not the unseen? Everyday obligations and requirements and living in a very demanding world, if you couldn't do your day, no further chance for tomorrow. Life became the blind race that dragging you unconsciously, carrying your to do list , keeping your eye on it and seeking what , where, when will help you to reach it and you hurry to get everything to be done either without thinking or surrendering to the obvious results. I have a question " Are you being able to breathe yet?" To sense the life within you? To get to know your connection to the earth you do exist in ? To hold a leaf and feel its surface and see how it is shaped? Wait a minute do you know that you are holding another life in your hand? This life is surrendering to the natural mechanism of the universe to help her to grow to such gracious wonderful tree.
Why am I mentioning this? you know why? Because I have been there, my eyes were focused on accomplishing my running down to- do- list, it never ended and yet it was leaving me lifeless, depressed, bored, exhausted and consumed. My brain works like a check list once a thing is done it is replaced by a new one and I have to worry about what is next, getting so anxious leaving me in a mental war of my endless to-do list. I think there was no real breathing life there and that brought me to the point Iam up-to- right now.
Another question comes into my mind " Did I discover the above on my own or there was a hidden force is moving my life into a rebellious soul leading me to uncover the hidden truth of the invaluable treasure was given to us freely that is our breath? For sure with the type of endless to-do list you will find yourself breathless and when God wants to reveal the truth into you, everything will be turned around and flip your life 180 degree, with or without your permission God's interventions happen without your permission as He is the Only ONE who is able to see the crust in your eyes and how much He loves you so He doesn't like the way you take things onto your shoulders He wants you armless to stretch His arms around you instead. He like you breathless as He is willing to breathe life into you again and again.He is the God of all creations so no matter the hectic life is trying to blind you, He is there for you to pick you up, and give you a new life, a life that will allow you to breath His heavenly grace unto you and everything you touch, see or be with.
He will give you the strength to breathe His presence within you, all guardian angels will surround you and protect you to keep your eye on His endless grace that is breathing new life into you,have faith and trust in Him for He is with you. By:Manal Eweis
Why am I mentioning this? you know why? Because I have been there, my eyes were focused on accomplishing my running down to- do- list, it never ended and yet it was leaving me lifeless, depressed, bored, exhausted and consumed. My brain works like a check list once a thing is done it is replaced by a new one and I have to worry about what is next, getting so anxious leaving me in a mental war of my endless to-do list. I think there was no real breathing life there and that brought me to the point Iam up-to- right now.
Another question comes into my mind " Did I discover the above on my own or there was a hidden force is moving my life into a rebellious soul leading me to uncover the hidden truth of the invaluable treasure was given to us freely that is our breath? For sure with the type of endless to-do list you will find yourself breathless and when God wants to reveal the truth into you, everything will be turned around and flip your life 180 degree, with or without your permission God's interventions happen without your permission as He is the Only ONE who is able to see the crust in your eyes and how much He loves you so He doesn't like the way you take things onto your shoulders He wants you armless to stretch His arms around you instead. He like you breathless as He is willing to breathe life into you again and again.He is the God of all creations so no matter the hectic life is trying to blind you, He is there for you to pick you up, and give you a new life, a life that will allow you to breath His heavenly grace unto you and everything you touch, see or be with.
He will give you the strength to breathe His presence within you, all guardian angels will surround you and protect you to keep your eye on His endless grace that is breathing new life into you,have faith and trust in Him for He is with you. By:Manal Eweis
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)