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One day, she looked at the world from a joyful place where all the good was around. Something was installed in her that keeps showing up in all the chapters of her life. She thought trust could easily exist and everything was exactly as it was. It was a fairy tale that only lived within her mind. Her smile, love for the world, and life were not something she could ever think would bring her to the darkest routs, trials, and tribulations, pushing her for who she is, and challenges and struggles start to roll through her life. The shock was heavy as every time she forgot, the challenges brought her to the place of punishment and happiness to see her struggle and doing nothing but going from one valley to another valley with all the scars leaving their print on her life. Trying to stand still, the reality brought her to the repeated scenario of running for over a decade. Only how she looks, talks, and does life does not please hundreds around.
Once, she thought there was something called freedom and that she had a right to have a life. Yet, there are hundreds whom she had no idea about their lives making the decisions of how her life has to be, and she found herself like a shadow, moving without a life inside. She became a shadow in the peaks of racial hate and trials. The thing she tried to bring to life is the same thing that used to break her down. She allowed many to step over her life without doing anything. Decades and years passed, and the moment when she was shattered, she came to meet herself in the dark shadow of human hate, jealousy, and betrayal of her life. Her scars are not enough, her challenges are not enough, and her slight thought of freedom is not her right. Finally, realizing that we are still in the world of slavery within different colors and backgrounds. Life is like a shadow in her mind; nothing is real or true, and the main thing is to keep walking in the shadow. The trials are meaningless as they reflect the weakness of the human flesh; if they can't control and own the life of someone, bring tribulations into their life so they will live in the shadow of life, afraid to speak or be seen as they are sure their presence is not pleasant for somebody.
She became afraid that her smile would trigger another peak of jealousy around her and the deliberate trials to bring her down. She realized there is nothing called human or respect for human life. She realized that as a woman, it has allowed many weak souls to tear her down and leave nothing but questioning: do we truly believe in the presence of God? Do we see humans in HIS image? Or do you see the human in me as an opportunity to take advantage of and break me down? The question is why some women are destined for hate from others and make their lives like a nightmare while others can have a normal life? Are we created to have a voice despite age, gender, race, culture, beliefs, language, ethnicity, sociopolitical, or socioeconomic status? Can we find a world where we can be without fear that someone at the corner somewhere keeping an eye on us to isolate and break us down? Many things don't make sense when life becomes a thing that has no taste or meaning. It is useless to think about, and we blame others for being in a complicated space, ignoring that we live in a world where freedom is a foreign word. Other terminologies took place where taking away the dreams of others is beneficial for some, as it allows them to enjoy the labor of those who believed once there was freedom in this world. It is another lesson to learn the realities around us. It is tough to believe or trust anything. Bringing struggle into the lives of those you can not control is your optimal joy. And that is not from GOD. Man-made laws and rules to bring struggle into humanity are not from GOD. She walks in a world where nothing can be believed. She walks on the thorny, unknown surface, trying to figure it out. There are many voices and silences, many stories untold, and many shared struggles that are kept inside the fears projected in life. What is true and what is not is a question left to the days that requested her to move on and know that there is GOD. Peace!!!! By: ME, "The old ancient woman."
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