Years go by, they leave their marks on us physically and emotionally. Especially as a woman who is facing high waves with all its forms. Still, she is determined to surf and dive to understand the ambiguity that is surrounding her journey. She chose her journey working with children as a scape from adulthood world that is hurtful and very unpeaceful. For her children are pure in heart, honest, and they say as it is. They do not have hidden agendas and are not trolls. Children are an empty vessel, we fill them with what help them to grow. Many wishes and dreams to build their intelligence and let the genius within them shine. Many beautiful dreams she had once with her own kids and dreamed to give the same dream for so many other kids.
She started with all heart and seized each chance to make the dream come true. The beginning was like the honeymoon that does not last forever, it is until each one becomes comfortable and the true self that what you see. Here you are faced with the hard questions, what is this about? And how I got here, facing a world of trolls who are celebrating your ignorance to let you go deeper and deeper in the well, till you are trapped nothing but waiting for your life to end. The dream fainted day by day as the battle becomes about you. How to break you down, how to slow you down, keep you in the place of ignorance and taking advantage of you. Questioning yourself, were you sold for slavery and that is why everyday life is sending a message, we got this and you are being used and bye bye and no thank you. Year after year when the waves come higher and higher, you start to question everything around you. Day by day nothing sounds true. The journey switched and you are trapped with no hope, falling in sadness and desperate for something called truth. The messages were clear yet I could not understand them back then. While you are in the oceans and nothing but sharks all around you, fed on your struggles and pains. Joy in breaking you down or beating you. Carrying the agenda for taking revenge for those they belong to. And your fault that you are carrying the race of people that are not welcomed or accepted, so you are paying a price on behalf of a race, generalization no distinguish of good or bad, all are bad, and passing the hate message of one generation to another.
As a woman who is by herself has to go through all the heartache and no voice. So each step of her journey is not considered or understood. Her challenges left scars on her heart and body that one day falls apart, the broken heart and broken body that is the goal and by her ignorance, she gave a chance for all this to happen due to the trust she put in the world. So she is reaping what she sows.
I many places she has been to, she was considered easy to be used. She was walking with the trust coat till it is ripped day after day, that brought to her the opening window to understand more about the real life she happened to exist in, slaves have to stay ignorant and trapped, and with limited resources or they will be aware of their ignorance and this won't serve the hidden motives surrounded them. The journey turned to be between the shark teeth where your pain remains and no hope can exist. She thought that slavery is done a long time ago, segregation, cold war, and no more place for such motives that rip the humans apart.
So making your day hard, challenging life, no hope or way out, all make you look within and the source of your creation. There is no inferior and superior race, we are all made in His image the most beautiful intelligence within. We are not tied to other crimes against humans till we take the leap of faith to change. Your aha moments come when you see the same negative patterns that have been told about you are being passed from group to group even they did not see you before, yet they are being deployed to carry the same mission of tearing you down as a human, so the journey turned to be adults against a woman, using children to fulfill the mission. More and more of tearing the trust coat.
Your day turned to be a high wave you have to face with grace. Surfing as hard as she could to stand in her truth and restoring her own self. Her escape turned to be her mission that has no limited vision and dreams, every single day she is receiving as the greatest gift from above, despite all the odds she meets in her day. The patterns are repeating themselves each year. Becoming more aware of her pains and struggles, diving deep to make sense. Her question, " what all this about?" is turning to, " what are you getting out of this?" Now here the question is about finding the right people, the right team to surf together and make this dream comes true. No place for trolls in her boat, as she had enough of them who sneakily worked behind the scenes to let her boat sink due to her ignorance.
Her struggles turn to be her mission and no settling down. No place for hate in her heart. No place for heartaches or all sources of negative energies that are trying earnestly to bring her down, so back to her question," What are you getting out of this?" I am one person, so what makes you have all this hate for me? No place for haters, no place for those who are not believing in God's incredible mission in creating me the way I am. No place for any who has the intention to deceive or lie to me anymore
Living the past pattern in the present does not make sense anymore. by: ME"The old ancient woman"
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