Working within the Childcare field for almost 8 years, each year brings another piece of understanding to the field I once choose to work within after 15 years of experience of work with Highschoolers and college students overseas. A huge shift and it looked like once I began walking within unknown gates, mazes and lives. Different cultures, different lifestyles and different beliefs. As a refugee first what everyone will see this person? A person in need of food and shelter so you have to get a job to be able to feed yourself so having a real life, a whole life this is not expected to a person who had nothing and had no future also almost reaching their 40th. So the expectations are getting what you get does not throw a fit. Understanding basic life skills was so restricted as if I was trying to look within a dark window, foggy, and cloudy. All I was I know is my passion to work with kids, explore their pure, honest world. Kids do not lie, deceit, envy, beat each other, or work behind the scene against each other. I want their pure hearts to carry me in my wilderness. Where open sincere advice hard to get. You have to teach yourself. You have to search for yourself. You have to know what you want by yourself so the journey is not easy, the journey is tough. Face the world that is the reality. You are on the edge as a single adult within her 40th at that time, no trust may be considered as a threat so restrictions are the way to put her under spot.
So, the Journey turned out to be not about the children anymore, as the conflict culture that what the business runs on. It was a shock at the beginning as my heart back then was like a child wanted to hang around children, help them to explore and learn about the world around them, feel confident to do things on their own. That was the mind that which was mocked, made fun of, taken for granted, and taken advantage of. So I found myself being judged for each word I say, stories are built around me and day by day my confidence is gone, left scared alone fighting the backlashes of the universe, my body started to manifest its tiredness through undiagnosed illness and some are diagnosed all I knew that all the hard conflicts, behind the scene, plots my body was affected by all of this. There were moments when I thought I am not going to make it the next day. The tough culture of survival, poison with the honey. We do go through life and the hard lessons within. And it all comes back to my child's heart back then. Working within undeclared agendas work environments won't lead an individual like me to be.
Having a deeper look the field is mastered and controlled by certain ethnic groups and the structure of how the business is going is being built from one generation to another, so putting people in the certain frame, label, box than what is expected or your life will be on the fringe all the time. So let us see what is accepted within the childcare business:
first, your race will determine what you will do and what you can not. If you are a person like me, restrictions will follow.
Second, If you have a family, children, body friend or girlfriend you are trusted ,a s you will be considered normal, not like me who put her mind and how far you can work on yourself through thinking more than personal relationships that are considered abnormal and all labels will be thrown at you, each action you take will be monitored you will find instead of your coworker who is supposed to be on the same page with you will be spying on you and reporting everything in their own perspective not what has to be done,so you find yourself turned to be a job for someone which makes me determined to be myself more than ever before.
third, on the community culture childcare has become a package in one place, a different form of babysitting and making connecting for trusted babysitters. Afterschool and during holidays, emergencies and even traveling so that is a big relief especially from 6 month-7 years old that is the biggest challenge to many families, so if a parent couldn't find this package here they are not happy.
fourth, it is another way to get to employ people who can travel for specific missions so if you are not one of these, narrow chance you will be accepted within the environment.
Wow, that is a lot eye-opening to me, my little world which is focused on academics, formalities, and dreaming of environment that the basic and primary focus is the child and providing them with all elements they want to set them for success for the rest of their lives. When we come to know that % 90 of the child's brain developed till the age of 5 that makes me come to a full stop. What design is prepared to make this time the most acknowledgeable and sustainable life of learning? Do we look at the dynamics of relationships of an adult as healthy dynamics? Do we acknowledge their presence around us? What kind of mental nourishment do you feed them? As what you feed reflects itself within their day outside the house? What they watch? who they communicate with? Lots of awakening questions coming to my mind when we realize that our tiredness, frustrations, impatient, prejudice, jealousy all unwanted hardcore feelings are being passed to the child through on simple spontaneous conversation and here the child receives all these maldesigned patterns as normal.
Yes, we are humans, yes we have feelings yet did you set the standard that when I am home when I am around children do I keep all these dysfunctional attitudes in private, bedrooms, outdoor Me time, adult time? And my kids will be surrounded with a type of high-level language that will help them establish new neurons and good communication patterns with peers, adults and within the society, they belong to. We all tend to spell our feelings no matter what they are the moment we feel them, yet lots of times it comes back to your perception not the reality or what has to be done. Doing chores with your child teach him responsibility instead of explaining why you hate this person or you can not stand this person. Normally we start to criticize others when we ourselves don't feel good about ourselves. there is hidden unfulfilled need or fallen dream so you pass you a negative mantra to your child which rob their innocence and taken away from their rights to have a healthy pattern of life, socially, mentally, and physically.
So, my choice as a refugee to work with children was not a complete profound vision setting. It was a naive approach to a person that felt once she has nothing to stick to in life but hope!!!!!!!! By: ME" The Old Ancient Woman"
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