Just A Stone

That's the best meditation time I could have when I visit a cemetery " From Ashes To Ashes, From Dust to Dust" and in between lies our whole journey here on earth till what is only left to make others remember us just a stone above your grave.

It doesn't matter what size is your stone or its nature even the most expensive ones can not bring you out of there where you can retell your story to tell the world how it looks like there, are you happy to be finally home or you wish to come back to redo  or undo what already have been done ? Can each one on earth write down their life before they go home? Can we read each other story even the person is no longer there or  is it ok  to tell your story here where you are alive and you can find ears to hear you and take the lessons you have learnt seriously and be a lamp to one another to guide each other till we reach the end of the tunnel? or again we don't listen and believe one another while we are here on earth till the person is gone and here we live with our regrets that we didn't listen to them or pay attention to them while they are with us. Our self centered nature and the competency that push itself into our lives makes us running in a very bubbly world each focused on their agenda not aware of the spirit living among them till they go home. 

It is a time of silence and getting wisdom from such sacred place that honor each soul lying under the stone. Sending my words to them and trying to listen to their wisdom and advice to me. From ashes to ashes what matters is what is between.

It is a good thing to remember where the flesh final home is and what stays alive is the soul that can roam around us , may send us messages from above to recall upon His name with faith that He listens who He gives ,takes away. He is giving us a free gift to honor and glorify His name while others use it for destroying one another and being controlled by their vain glory no matter who is around number 1 is them not anyone else. 

Choosing to live a life of my choice to go deep into denying the flesh is not an easy route to take as this is not the norm around you, people may call you names or telling different stories about you and you find yourself in a big lie called life of the world. Either my way or no way.

To keep your faith you have to carry your own stone of perseverance , endurance and rising above all things are being said. Each word is a sowed into my  heart not to beat me yet to remind me of the far end "Just A stone" no matter what are you trying to do, you have to keep your eyes aware of the devil scheme, he won't stop, faces may change, places may change yet the message is one, my way or no way. That is the race he started to prove his power on earth. 

Being aware of his scheme doesn't allow me to sleep on my mission that race is not done yet, I belong to the only ONE who made the heaven and the earth. Our battle is against the flesh if we could win it ,heaven will be on earth, yet heaven does exist within you your body, mind and soul , sailing in His endless grace knowing that He owns it all we all are only guests whatever you are trying to do in between by the end will go back to Him and He is the Only ONE to say the final word.

As long as you believe He gave you this breath for a reason , don't make anything to stop you from believing or He will win. Keeping this as a reminder to yourself when you see the sparkle of the world surrounding you " From Ashes to Ashes, From dust to Dust" what is in between that matter to you that what are you going to do, have faith by: Manal Eweis "The Old Ancient Woman"  

Unappreciated Love(2)

We wake up in the morning, many thoughts are going on in our mind. Flashes from yesterday and old scenarios, this may take our focus on the present means today. We hear alot the past is the past, yet our spiritual warfare the enemy loves to push and press on the past buttons so you are not going anywhere. And that is our spiritual warfare that may confuse us and make us unable to think clear. Focusing on the enemy distractions takes away the foundation of which we have to remind us minute by minute with God's unconditional love for us and how He forgives us all, giving us our life, breath, chances to be at the present moment.

Spiritual warfare are not meant to built God's unconditional love for us on earth they are meant to allow certain agendas specially personal ones when the enemy knows what is ahead of you and you are not aware of it. Trying to snatch you away from what is ahead of you and taking it for themselves and here comes the rule of the reigning flesh. The world we live in. May I ask myself many times am I participating in this by giving the enemy the chance to distract me and keep me out of track by being open and allowing them to see my weaknesses to use them against me?  And here comes another question why many ask you to be open and vulnerable while it is meant to break you down ? Is it a deceitful  way to twist the truth?

In our endless competency world we live in, some tends to search for the vulnerable to use them as a tool to get what they want. In our modern world being vulnerable may not the right decision as you expose your life which is a precious gift from God and He put such precious gift freely into your hand to honor Him ,to reflect His Mighty image within you so am I seeking earthly strength or heavenly strength that is the choice that each one of us is taking each day they are here on earth.

So, the conflict of our choices will never even, the battle is ours not the enemy , we are the ones who give the enemy the chance to turn our lives upside down. That's true in the world of high standards , you won't be able to predict what is next and where are you going next. I have to put my armor of guard to see with the heart of God not the world and watch my steps where iam going and where my choices can lead me to.

Faces can change, yet the battle is the same, the weapons are the same, words are repeating themselves in different faces , stand still and know that Iam God doesn't mean to be passive , you are active to do what is right. You are active to speak the truth, be aware of the twisting words and scenarios as you already have been through this passage of clarity and confusion. There is a deep cry out now in your chest stop manipulating me and be straight forward . Stop pressing my weaknesses for in my weaknesses His strength reveals. Stop twisting and back stabling as He sees it all.

Seeking Heavenly strength doesn't depend on our physical ones, His work is different to show what we can not do on our own , Guard your heart and be fully confident in His unconditional love for you   by: Manal Eweis "The Old Ancient Woman"

Call Me Crazy, Unwise , Fool or whatever comes to your mind then what........?

Another risk I have taken, quitting my secure Job with secure payment and benefits. A job was considered a huge life lesson in my life. It taught me many things about life. From being in boxed , doll life into a rough tough hands on activities. A job that led me to give away more and more and be centered on understanding my true self, meaning and purpose...

Yes, there are stations in our lives we reach a point of no where, 'No Entry' sign is surrounding you and no way here you have to turn away and change directions. In  modern life we live ,GPS make it so easy to roam the places you don't know. Yet, what will happen when your GPS turn to be off and you have to find your way on your own. Unknown directions, places, names and signs you completely unaware of. How do you feel at this time? Some panic, crash, stress out and lose energy calling 911 won't help you further as they will give you directions and yet won't walk the way with you as an adult you are supposed to understand everything. you are supposed to be prepared , had your personal networking, circle of connections you know at least your family. To call someone you know or asking people on the way.

Yet what would you do if your cell don't work, is dead, no charger even almost no gas. Wow what a celebration of problem- solving and learning how to be prepared. Prayers, calling out the name of Jesus to be your fellow & celebrate the journey. First thing you have to recall each road you passed by, making mind map and new predictions or assumption of how to reach the point you were supposed to reach long long time. Aha, it is being said that mistakes help our brain cells to grow and  generate new neurons. Ok, Putting every theory into action and try every possible out come. All you have to do is to try and never give up. Estimation plays a huge part of each assumption you make. All you need is to pay attention to the mistakes you have done before and remind yourself, yes here where I missed up. Here where I lost my way, Here where i got lost in each distraction around me.

Analyzing your points yet don't over analyse as time runs fast, time won't wait upon you. Time passes like vapor if you miss your point again time will pass and you will be late even reach your destination so late. That's the logic analysis. Each second counts. Each moment in your life counts.

Writing down your notes . Looking at them from time to time. Don't pity yourself as this is a tool of self destruction. Some actions may push you this way,don't give it a chance. Are you challenging yourself or the life you live. No my dear Iam walking with my Mighty Father who made the whole universe and created me in His image so if we are created in His image so how far we can reach. Put your fears away, trust Him the ONE who is watching over you. Yes, Iam in my mid life crisis trying to find a meaning and a purpose to my life, trying to find my way in the world in a way to honor Him and give Him all the glory to Him I do belong.

So starting over is letting me to understand truly what I was made for. What he meant for me. Yes, I am different from many around me yet there has to be respect for any differences we see in one another , as He didn't make us the same for a reason. Respecting our differences , give Him honor and appreciation for whatever He created within us.

So Letting Him to be my GPS is the new lesson that He is teaching me right now. Learning to trust in honoring Him in each step we take.... Yes, Iam starting over , doing the stinky job as my friend said one day , yet Iam not allowing any space not to honor God in whatever I do / Yet many will think this will lead to more breaking down to my pride and stubbornness, yet He sees me and watches over me.

Letting Him to be my GPS may don't make sense to the world around me, Yet he will make all the sense one day. Starting over with one vision that we were created in His image. What this will make sense for you, it is different from one another, so Iam not comparing myself to others, Iam letting my steps to be guided by Him , Iam blind, dummy, lack understanding and knowledge yet He is my master and teacher He is so patient with His child to teach her the lessons He wants her to learn and absorb, so let it be ,by:Manal Eweis " The Old Ancient Woman"

Unappreciated Love

These words hit me at a sudden this morning. No wonder why they are coming to me now. A clear interpretation to the love of God. Do we as humans really aware of His love to us and how far and deep can this love which is given freely can lead our lives on daily basis, moment by moment or we carry our baggage and keeping filling it till it takes away our sense of God's love into us?

Looking at simple routines through our day, on small scale and large scale, you notice that each behavior , attitude, reaction and action is based on what we insert against one another depending on history, political, socioeconomically and interests.  This take away the true light of God's unconditional love to us. We get deep in the flesh, get deep in the outside forgetting the true source of the light within.Wait a minute, excuse me this light won't pay my bills, won't help me to live the style I aspire to live, won't put food on the table or secure a roof over my head or get me the spouse of my dream, won't let me take vacations and travel the world, won't get me this or that and here the baggage becomes more and more heavier that make our vision so blurry to see God's love and what does it mean or truly help us to live our day in peace.


The world took our attention from purpose and meaning and turned our lives into a very radical materialistic type of life that when you meet with a person is different from that you start your judging, undermining ,devalue and never appreciate them as a person the way they are.

World standards become the true purpose of humans are living around you. the equation to live even a simple life is becoming more and more harder that leads to question yourself, what life is all about? Will my will to have simple humble life , be  ridiculed or am I misunderstanding the equation from the beginning? What does it mean to be born with a heart that is washed by the grace of God? and how you take this heart and live in the world and be considered normal not something else? Again what am I missing? Do we still believe in the unconditional love of God without a question or due to the heavy baggage of unhealthy relationships that are taken as norm and unable to differentiate between the good and the bad, all are bad apples , nothing is purely considered?

This morning was a hit for me, there were many thing God wanted to teach me to reach this point of understanding. Awareness, knowledge are two powerful key life operators.

As a woman I had no decision to be created this way or look like this or think like this ,it is all God's creation. Realizing that how you look, think , act can put you in a very challenging journey, make  me question what do we really believe within ourselves are we created in God's image and to be honored or we are tools to be used in the flesh , how you wear or put on can determine how the world will receive you. Can it be a true life that remembering God's creation and we have no choice in that ? All these thoughts came to my mind and then I told myself again wait a minute, you are the one who determine how the other treat you, if you allow yourself to be swiped under the mat then don't blame any one. My ignorance that led me to such a way of thinking. Your action, your presence that determine how the world will receive you. Paying attention everyone is packed with a baggage about one another. So, stop and think, be aware that a new equation has to be written on how our hearts may be created differently and that forms minds and lives. It is all starts with the heart not the mind while you depend mostly on the mind. May logic make sense yet our baggage determine the actions and results.

Unappreciated love is a new topic that will lead me to represent how we as humans due to the chaotic overwhelmed styles may blind us to depreciate God's love and they way He created us differently making the world our God not God Himself. Seeking deep understanding to this core point that controls how our lives may go this way or that way.By: Manal Eweis "The Old Ancient Woman"