As the world is celebrating Women's History Month, and after more than Covid-19, and the outcomes with inflation, empowering women and girls became a national duty not to fall into the trap of slackness and settle for choices that will bring more conflict and harm to the emotional being. Women and girls want to know their worth and value more than ever to bring humanization to their existence. Iam talking about those more vulnerable to life challenges, not those with well-established social support. I am talking about those who open their eyes every day and fall into the trap of comparison." look, she is the same age as me, yet she has more opportunities than me. She got this and that. She does this, and that... and the rumination cycle goes on, changing the person from within, how they perceive the world, and more and more see themselves shrinking, and invisible." This is a typical inner battle within the women and girls brought into communities that don't meet their needs or make them feel safe and nurtured. An inner hunger to get out of this cycle leads them to choices that can create more challenges, complex mental conflicts, and trauma. Giving easily to the social pressures and demands to get out of the struggle cycle economically and socially.
Due to the high living expenses, girls learn co-dependency from an early age; I have to have someone to meet my needs. The economic factor is the core component of the relationship. Hence, Risk taking is the common dominator in the equation of abusive relationships to emerge. One side is dominating how things should go, taking advantage of the helplessness of the other to gain control and power. Low self-esteem is a requirement for holding the dependent under control turning from the honeymoon phase when the prince charming makes all their efforts to impress the other. Once the other fall into the trap, another phase starts with criticism, judgment, isolating the person from those who mean something to them, and running psychological and mental games by causing havoc around the person feeling depleted, confused, don't trust themselves anymore. Wiping every beautiful thing from their day, that the other fall trapped in more helplessness, no way out; I deserve all that is going on; I deserve to be abused and mistreated and become a self-fulfilling prophecy that they don't deserve to be loved, cared for, be safe, nurtured, and have confidence that they can do something different. Therefore, when one relationship fails, they blame themselves, bring shame and guilt into their lives, and that becomes their projected life, moving from one failed relationship to the other, depleting every chance to bring their confidence back, falling short into I can't do it, I have to find somebody. They lose themselves in the projections of others' abuse, misuse, and self-destruction. And the majority start with this thought: I have to get out of here and find somebody to make this come true, and who is that? Someone here is the journey of broken relationships and depleted souls begin.
When women and girls are brought up within environments that don't model healthy relationships, that will become their intuitive understanding of the nature of human relationships. Therefore, that is normal; they haven't experienced healthy relationships, and the predator understands that well. They study their prey for enough time to know how to seduce and when to strike. Predators have no empathy toward women; they may seem or sound like, yet a closer look over time reveals their true nature, and unfortunately, it will be too late as the harm has already been done. The victim will take it as their own fault and bring self-punishment to themselves; therefore, their mental, physical, and emotional well-being has already been compromised. And that is the most significant betrayal females can bring into their lives, that is, self-betrayal, to have self- false beliefs and manifestations into their lives. Unfortunately, many witnesses such a toxic dynamic yet silently walk away.
The world has witnessed women and girls' mistreatment for centuries. However, a few examples stood for what is right and fought for that right. They have a choice and commitment toward themselves to walk the path of least walked. Their footprint is ingrained for those who notice them, become curious about them, and want to understand why they walked this path, to learn and grasp the wisdom from their stories and journey. The path of the least walked is not a rosy path; it is filled with scars, tears, rejection, abuse, determination, and commitment to joining the path of the least walked. It is not a quick fix or instant recipe. Each walk has its designated unique prints that match the true story of its initiator. However, the struggle is the common factor in each story told. It is not like a butterfly cycle, as many butterflies have such unique, beautiful patterns yet short lifespans; it is like the diamonds made of a single element, carbon %100, formed under immense heat and pressure far below the surface of the earth, each pattern is unique crystalline shapes, the more they age, the more expensive they get with their glamours, untainted beauty. And if each girl and woman treat themselves like a diamond and come to the sense of knowing their worth, they will become unstoppable in the spirit, and that is what the predators don't want their prey to understand or know since that will make them aware of their worth, and value. By predators, I mean each person, male or female, rich or poor, is abusing the existence of the female gender. And everyone is taking away women's and girls' right to be themselves, and feel safe, loved, cared for, and supported. It all starts with educating the most vulnerable to know and see their worth so that they can have a fulfilled and safe life. By: ME, "The ancient old woman." Peace !!
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