Hello There, and welcome to February 2025.
No matter what is happening, take a moment and listen to your breath, which is taken for granted. The process of filtration to the most essential matrix becomes a reality, the pendulum, the fluctuation of thoughts, and reactions reflect the pressured layers of past pain, frustrations, distractions, the years that had gone, and already their count can not go down, the clock is ticking with the increase of experiences, times of wonder, and the deviation from the linear path once thought it was. Finding good hearts becomes like a treasure hidden in the deep desert land where many things around sound, feel, and look dry. The longing for the plain where the sight goes as far as it could be. Looking for a marble of trust, and sanity. Looking at the complex tapestry of different voices of expressions, different languages, faces, and many other tangled realities guiding the slight ray of hope.
Days pass by and still, the mixture of in-between-the-lines remains a mystery to the wonderous minds who once depended on others, waiting for their life to be designed by others, and who were, and are the others? A complex thorny Within the the sense of what is called once a family, society or a community however the dependency was driven by a misunderstanding of relationships based on race, ethnicity, age, gender, cultural background, and group dynamics. it depends on the perception of the other that many surrendered their lives hoping that they will handle everything with understanding to the human welfare. It is hard to understand that realities are not what is hoped for. Millions struggle at an early age, leaving them either taking risks, depending on the other or shut down and disassociated from the world around them through self-harm. Relationships have no foundation therefore the person becomes a tool in whatever comes their way, loaded with wonder, and struggles till it comes the moment it is too much to handle, and the time passes by till it is hard to handle or face their challenge at a level of maturity and growth. Sadly shaking foundations bring much turmoil, and incidents that overwhelm the dependent. The body is designed to bear a specific threshold of stress load, however, the game of dependency.
It is a tangled chain of forgetting the self hoping the same occurs from the other side. years pass by to come to a definite point that it was on way direction of communication, interaction, perception, and outcomes. I wasn't and won't be bidirectional pathway of understanding, interaction, and communication. Different threads tangle at the point of overwhelm encoding its print on the human DNA. Years and days pass to understand the harm, and hurt was intentional to drain, deplete, control, and create that tapestry of distractions, chaos, drama, and trauma. Thriving on creating conflict when the common sense presents a different view from what is taking place.
The conflict creates mountains of illusions, illusions become beliefs, and shatter confidence, and the goal is to gain control, and have the space, and time to execute the game of manipulation, the entanglement of unresolved confusion, distraction, and harm, and this perspective of dependency changes with the phases of life, however, its blueprint encoded in the human DNA running the body on autopilot, and comparing the pat patterns with the present, repeating the loop of too much to handle, the avoidance, the disassociation, loading the central nervous system with toxic load depleting the remains of hope to change. A codependent has this wishy-washy thinking, and view of things. It can be loud in their head, perceiving and interpreting others' messages completely away from what it is. Outcomes shape the shaky grounds, and breaking down confidence with increased anxiety can result in hyperactivity in response to any changes or different outcomes from what is perceived. Perception does not mean reality, perception is based on the individual unique experiences within a given context related to specific events creating a threat, a sense of persistent fear of abandonment, connecting current perception of abandonment to past ones creating a cascade of trauma response whether resulting in disorganized attachment, avoidant, insecure, anxious style of intra-interpersonal relationships. The behavior becomes maladaptive as a coping mechanism with the fear of abandonment.
Society is not designed on trauma-informed relationship dynamics, creating another layer of the initial Trauma "T" , or trauma "t" with labeling, judgment, projection, gaslighting, and hazing, among others unaware of the vicious loop of mal-adaptive mechanisms to protect or prevent a perceived threat. Imagine, the accumulated score of traumatic, disorganized attachment changes the brain's neurofunction and structure presenting a new personality, identity, and chaotic form of a human being walking through life with a wounded inner child, feeling abandoned, and neglected, has to start all over a gain, and it is a fearful place for the traumatized brain. Unfortunately, societies are not designed to understand the load of trauma and its pathophysiological on human life in general, and those who are encountered in the circle specifically. Unfortunately, those who are highly traumatized and did not learn how to stand up for themselves from age seven years old to thirty-five will the the food of the life sharks those who misuse, abuse, and take advantage of the trauma load to manipulate, control, oppress, and suppress the rest of the dependent.
The core foundation of identity and who the person is in the real world. On the contrary, within a trauma-informed environment, many will have this sense of getting to know themselves within the challenge they face, within trauma-informed care will promote Let's face it, and chunk it into small portions to learn how to handle it with grace, compassion, and attention to its purpose and meaning. How about putting the event in different perspectives? How about looking at it as the teacher, what does it want to teach you? Many things change humans over time experiencing the good, the bad, and the ugly there is a missing piece that societies do not emphasize which is to know thy self and embrace your unique way of understanding life, however, there has to be a space between you and the other to have the opportunity to understand how could you face the fears by addressing the elephant in the room "thoughts, and perception of others". You are worthy of the effort you will put into understanding yourself so you can relate to the self in the developmental form in/ and away from the world's superficial rules, and manufactured self. The illusion that your identity has to be shaped by others is allowing many unwanted routes to come your way. We have taken life for granted to the point, that many do not care for life or consider it the most precious gift that has been given from heaven and it is priceless while others sell lives for nothing but vain outcomes. I wish you well, and this month of February 2025 may present you with a different perspective that you are responsible for your life in a way that allows you aware of its priceless value. May you develop the awareness that the world is not a utopia, and you are the common dominator in many events. Let past experiences be a teacher to show you how valuable you are, and walk with confidence that you are created in GOD's image....... Peace!!! By: ME, "the old ancient lady."
