Scribble----- Scrabble..... find the meaning to know the truth.... keep on searching

 

https://www.pexels.com/photo/close-up-shot-of-scrabble-tiles

https://www.pexels.com/photo/close-up-shot-of-scrabble-tiles

        At a point in our grown-up life, we go through this rumbling and chaotic sense of life around us. As if we see the world for the first time as if the child's perspective about the world around us has scattered into millions of unsorted letters, creating this state of wondering, and questioning, 'What is all this about? how can I find the words that make sense of the unsorted pile of letters that don't make any sense?' Have you ever heard of the phrase, 'exit freedom has a price'? Particularly for women who have untraditional life journeys, and the majority of their lives, they fight battles that aren't their own, yet, they make them their own till the moment the only voice can be heard is theirs echoing back to them. Watching themselves in an empty arena of voiceless thoughts, feelings emotions, and unsorted letters. The words once made meaning, fell apart, the phrases that were the text to shape communication turned to be fault, and the presence of their energy became unwanted, avoided, and questioned. So, welcome to life after middle age when women reap the accumulated outcomes of unfulfilling experiences, trauma, aches, disadvantages, failures, and loss in the chaos of useless experiences, time flew by within the times of the most essential times of their lives and trying to chase nothingness to find nothing but exhaustion, consumption, and stillness of their voice. imagine with me this rebellious state of not wanting to be, or escaping all of this leaving everything behind to find nothing but another chaotic life. All scenarios presented nothing but negative, toxic, and tearing the soul apart, finishing the task of consuming them through the toughest trials. They find themselves at a point when they can't say anything anymore as they discover the wasted life. Chance to rework life from the beginning is an imppssible mission, and they see the scars within and out, misshaped, misfit, and left behind....... The shock made them more silent and all the weight loaded upon them that they couldn't leave their shoulders or eyes to see what already happening, distancing the mind, and traveling at no point of meaningless wasted time. Many fell more into the trap of depression, withdrawal, or even the senseless existence of a shadow, unable to make sense of their day or whoever they are surrounded with as they witnessed their fall day by day and didn't do anything about it. 

        It doesn't matter how many people you are around, as there may be thousands, yet their impact on their lives is nothing but chaos, disaster, and destroying the mind, yet many embrace such culture, especially against women. It is easy to break a person, yet it is hard to build them up or bring them back to life. How many witness these scenarios and do nothing, the powerful suppress the weak and the able disable the powerless. The fallen have nothing to do but rewind what had happened in their moments of silence and discion of no-existence state of hopelessness, and weighted down. Not every woman had to go through this journey. It destined to those who first believed in the world around them, yet they couldn't read or understand "the behind the curtain', the little secrets that grew over time of the choice to please others, to give more, to accept to be invisible, to go voiceless, to allow life to happen to them, thinking they will survive. Survival brain and maladaptive when it comes to fawning it destroys nothing but the person themselves as the abuser is enjoying this mind game of destruction. The words I use may be more negative than positive. Yet this is the reality that many don't want to talk about it or say anything about it due to fear, intimidation, or getting along. 

     

        It comes to my awareness that women's rights have to be taught at an early age, as early as one year old. Being female, being a girl, being a woman isn't permission to be invisible, used, and abused. Specifically when adverse childhood trauma is in place which became a ticket for more use and abuse and many societies are silent about it. No wonder 7 out of 10 neurodegenerative diseases are women, 4 0ut of 10 experienced discrimination, 21.7% lived with chronic pain, 44% with Cardiovascular disease which is associated with the development of neurodegenerative diseases, 4%  high increase in stress, 2X experiencing trauma, 23-31 % experienced domestic violence, and intimate partner violence from age 14-49 of years, 46% experienced compromised workplace safety, 4% have at least on autoimmune disease, moreover racism which is identified as public health issue added another burden of disease particularly CVD and lack of quality of life. That is not all the statistics that present themselves on how women are seen, heard, and exist, modern age created this culture that "women are not protected by their community, groups, or environment", which raises the alarm of how to define a healthy culture from year one, at a very early age, empowering girls to be safe, protected, and cared for their well-being. Despite the advanced high tech, the human moral compass on a large scale is falling apart. Few can be aware, understand, and create the nurturing, and empowering culture of equipping girls and women with a safe world to be. Are societies pushing specific women groups to the havoc of chaotic life? to what advantage this is happening? Is it a collective phenomenon or are women themselves required to take things into their own hands, educate themselves, be informed, and be empowered so they are not left behind, and cursed within the moral compass of the community? How can we identify the vulnerable among the herd so they won't silently fall apart, or behind? How we create a sense of agency to be a transparent, motivator, and empower those who got lost in the chaos to resort to the letter and create meaning out of it? It is a new phenomenon communities are facing with a growing old women population, how can they be empowered to reorder their life purpose, and use their choad as an unfair advantage to create something new? How that can have an impact on stress levels, quality of life, and finding a new voice? I think you have to scribble scrabble till you find the meaning you were born for, and the purpose you are meant for... Put your fears aside, and others' intimidation about your voice to be heard, and embrace yourself as you are, with no expectations, and keep on searching, peace, ME,' The old ancient woman." 

Brokenness and its power - A choice to make either to fall or rise ......

              https://images.search.yahoo.com/search/images;_ylt

          How many walk through life accepting the the external world of their character, behavior, attitudes, beliefs, and their perception of themselves from the lens of others? How many allowed this perception to let them shrink in a deep sense of unworthy, don't measure up, or never been enough? Allowing the projection of others pain, hurt and failures to replicate human brokenness. If we are honest with ourselves, we can look closer to the shadow we participate to create. In one way or another no one is whole, no one got it all. Yet, perception controlled the way we allowed to see ourselves with the lens of "The Other". How many have the habit of selection the wrong "The Other". How many got lost in the gyser of the other projecting their brokenness into ourlives? How many trusted without questioning the motives behind all the ambiguous situations added into our lives? Deviating from the core, and looking at the smog, vapor, and fake flame of the other. In fact human perception of reality starts to decline from 25 years old of age. Hence, we have to ask the question if our perception of reality is declining since 25 years of age, so does our current perception of reality present the whole truth, and the real world or it is a scrapbook from collected past experiences ,and the meaning or label put untothese scraps. Hence , the brain already has a storage of scaps of memories whether are good, or hurtful they form the original version of macro film stored in the different parts of the brain ,and through the senses, specifically the sight this macro film has been recalled according the the present situation, maladaptive, or adaptive behaviors to cope are projected automatically once the stimulus matched the code stored in the brain resulting into the same behavior, attitudes, and beliefs. It is not an easy spot to navigate through as long as experiences accumulate, and over time they become our reality, the lens where we see, feel, listen, and relate to the world around us. Confusion occurs when many fallacies present themselves into the human mind. 

           Therefore, the older we get, the deeper  human lose their way to face their own realities that once they escaped from. Escape can occur through withdrawal, self- medicate, numbness, denial, or even accept the robe of shame and guilt putting themselves into this loop of worthilessness, helplessness, victimhood, and many toxic patterns of behaviors, and beliefs. If you can believe that you are your thoughts, no wonder, they controlled your life, and allowed others to control them by projecting their unwanted thoughts, troubles, confusion unto you. And here, humans found themselves in a place where understanding the joy of life, is a foreign concept, as confusion, ambiguity, and struggle are the common dominator. Misery loves company, hence, then bad thoughts, restless thoughts love company attracting the same frequency your thoughts are leading you to an endless agroument of worthilessness. Your thoughts become your physiology, your thoughts become your emotions, your emotions become your uptodate biochemistry, thoughts, feelings, memories are shaping your biochemistry affecting each cell of your body. Never understamte the power of thoughts. Research shows that exposure to toxic relationships lower the person IQ by 30%. Sono wonder how we allowed the incomplete perception of reality to be rule number one in conducting life. No wonder the declining level of literacy in math and reading. No wonder human healthy relationships are far fetched imagery. No wonder self control is a joke as mockery the new smart, the more humans mock one another the more they see themselves smart, yet unable to see the power of mockery in reflecting the broken soul. Mockery is a scape from facing our own true self. Mockery is the sarcastic form of hidden pain, yet pride deprive the person from showing their own feelings, emotions, and thoughts. The fear culture that allowed humans to deny themselves to hide in the brokenness of others. Hence, the result is the fall of that delusional perception of reality, maybe earlier in life or later where there is no way back. 

            On the other side, we find those who were courageous enough to face their false perception of reality, and extract the beauty from their brokenness. Broken mean, there is reshaping, repurposing, and reinnovating the scap version of many delusional, confusion perception of reality. It is concise in one question simple and easy as is that,"What do you want?" not what the world want me to do or think or uptake into mylife. How many wasted years to do what others want them to do? Was it successful? Did it help them to honor, respect, and protect their life? Did it make them stronger in seeing behind the fallacy? Or did it bring to them the reality that when they face it, they won't regret, or wish it couldn't happen? did it bring to the a fall or a rise? False perception of reality led to many hurtful judgments, and brought nothing but more suffering into the human life. The brokness is a mere thought, it is an idea can be used to mend, or to separate more in a way that destination is unknown. The soil has to break in order to the seedling see the light, the sun, to grow, and prosper. Once we have the courage to admit our brokenness and see it as a god's given task to let His wonderous work to work through you, within you, and for you, to reflect His Mighty power over any other power want to forcefully put the robe of shame and guit upon you for their own jealousy, and restless soul. So, wake upand know who owns it all,He won't see brokness, He sees work in progress, a piece of art in process to reflect new image, new function, new purpose, and new life. Look at you brokenness as your guidance to where best to utilize. Pick up the piece and start mending your own master piece where no other copies can be created at once, yet it is a master piece of faith ,for we walk by faith not by sight. Peace!!! By: ME."The old ancient woman."